A Secret Love Affair

Chapter 18

Paige walked out of the room feeling embarrassed and defeated. Embarrassed because for the first time in a long time she dared put her heart on the line only to be rejected. Defeated because she felt like talking to Sienna was like talking to a brick wall. There was no getting through to her and maybe it was time for Paige to give up and begin the process of moving on.

Paige walked about a block before meeting her rideshare at the corner. She had been so upset when leaving the house she realized she forgot her sweater. The heat in the sedan quickly warmed up her body and as it blew against a pine tree air freshener, the scent reminded her of the holidays and how yet another year she'd be spending them alone.

When Paige arrived at Windsong, pretty much the only place in town she felt comfortable in, she made her way toward the counter to get her order in. The wooden shelves were adorned with mugs and coffee tumblers. The smell of baked pastries hit her nose, and the rumble in her stomach reminded her that she had only had a granola bar and a banana for breakfast.

"Welcome to Windsong, can I take your order?" Asked the pretty blonde girl behind the counter.

"Hi," Paige said, as she looked up at the menu written above her in chalk. "Can I have...a medium hot latte with two shots of espresso and two pumps of agave?" Paige asked while grabbing a packet of cookies.

"You should add a few pumps of vanilla. Makes it less plain." The barista said, flashing Paige a million dollar smile.

"Do I look like a vanilla girl to you?" Paige smiled, getting a good look at the barista.

"You don't strike me as anything vanilla but sometimes a little vanilla is all you need. It's subtle, it's easy, not complicated. There are days when a little vanilla does the trick" The barista looked deep into Paige's eyes while taking her debit card. Her fingers grazed Paige's fingers as she took the debit card from her hand.

Paige felt a stir inside of her. She was picking up on what the girl was saying. Maybe something easy was what she needed. After weeks of the challenge that was Sienna, Paige just needed a break.

"I'll take the vanilla." Paige took her card back and watched the girl behind the counter as she began making her coffee. Her blonde hair was up in a bun, the visor she wore which Paige was sure was designed to make everyone unattractive while in the workplace actually looked good on her.

Paige took a seat in a comfy leather couch that was hidden in a quiet little corner. She pulled out her laptop and began searching for flights back home to Florida.

"Great" Paige muttered to herself when she found the only flights available were way above her price range due to Christmas being around the corner. She grabbed her phone and opened her text messages. She began typing out a message to her dad asking for the money for a ticket when she heard someone talk to her.

"You're not from around here, huh? You don't strike me as an Arkansas girl" The girl said, taking a seat next to Paige.

"Nope. I'm from Florida, just here for the holidays." Paige responded while getting a better look at the girl whose big beautiful eyes were saying more than the words coming out of her mouth. She had taken her visor and apron off which Paige assumed meant her shift was over. "So, do you make it a habit to sit down with all your customers or is it just me?" Paige asked, trying to get a read of the girl's face.

"My shift just ended and not necessarily all my customers, just the really hot ones." The girl responded, the glimmer of a grin appeared on her lips. "I'm Candi, your friendly neighborhood barista. What's your name?" Candi said, extending her hand to shake Paige's. The gesture was cute and flirtatious and far from formal.

"Paige," Paige replied, shaking Candi's hand. Her hands were soft, they were warm. For a moment Paige felt herself becoming weak. If this were any other time she would have already made a move on this girl.

"So, Paige. My roommate is out of town, she's visiting family for the holidays. That means my two bedroom apartment is a little too quiet for comfort. I've got a TV and a lot of time on my hands. You look like maybe you want to kill some time. Want to do it together?" She asked, casually putting her hand on Paige's knee.

"Crap" Paige thought to herself. She knew going to a second location would be a bad decision but since when was she known to make good decisions? The only good decision she thought she had made ended up blowing up in her face.

"Yeah, let's go." Paige responded while putting her things away in her bag.

When Paige and Candi arrived in the quaint apartment, Paige immediately felt wrong. It was like she wasn't this person anymore. The person who so easily flirted and who easily slept around. Candi invited her in, Paige took a seat on the small couch while Candi turned on the TV. After much debating on what to watch, they settled on a season of Drag Race.

"So, before we start watching these fabulous queens kill it on the runway, would you like something to eat? I can whip up a mean cheese plate." Candi said, smiling at Paige.

"Yeah, I can eat something. Do you need any help prepping?" Paige asked.

"No, I've got it." Candi responded, walking toward the kitchen.

Within minutes Candi came out with a few cheeses on a board, some crackers and two beers. Paige couldn't believe how relaxed she felt, how easy this was. Just hanging out with someone, no gloom of a significant other looming over them. Just two people enjoying each other's company.

Candi took a seat next to Paige on the small couch and it wasn't long before they were making out. As Candi sat on Paige's lap, she wrapped her legs around her. Her kiss was hungry and her hands were starting to go rogue. She slipped her hands inside Paige's shirt and began kissing down her neck. Paige felt the urge to just flip her over and top her but she let Candi resume control.

"I wanted you from the moment I saw you at the shop last night." The girl whispered into Paige's ear as she began removing Paige's shirt off.

Paige smiled and sexily bit on Candi's lip. When she took Candi's shirt off and she was certain the kissing was quickly escalating, Paige felt a wave of guilt hit her. She thought about the last time she was in a situation like this, it had been with Sienna.

Paige continued kissing Candi but realized she didn't feel anything. Her body was obviously reacting, almost as if going through the motions, it was on autopilot but kissing Candi didn't feel like anything. She quickly realized the only person she wanted to be doing this with was Sienna.

"Wait wait wait" Paige put her hands on Candi's chest and pulled away. "I can't" She said, looking away trying to hide her face that she knew was riddled with shame.

"What? Do you have a girlfriend?" Candi asked out of breath, her lips swollen from kissing.

"No, maybe, it's complicated I guess." Paige responded, grabbing her t-shirt that was hanging off the side of the couch.

"Seriously?" Candi asked, a look of annoyance on her face. She quickly jumped off Paige and grabbed her shirt as well. "I am not about to bring drama into my house so I think you better go. This is just... I don't know, it's a little weird. I don't know why you agreed to come over if you were going to back out but I think you better leave." Candi said, looking at the door.

For the first time in her life, Paige was the one who felt used. She was on the other side pretty much being told to grab her stuff and go. Just like she had done to a number of girls. The feeling of shame and embarrassment crashed into her like a wave.

Sitting on the curb, outside of Candi's apartment, tears began to fall down Paige's face. How had she gotten to where she was? Weak, falling for a girl who couldn't get it together and in a foreign place following said girl. Paige wanted to give up. She picked up her phone and texted her dad. She didn't care about groveling anymore, she had to leave Arkansas, she needed to get back home.