Whispers of unspoken words

A Lament for Lost Friendship

I recently lost a friend, and to be quite frank it wasn't the first time losing them. When we parted ways for the first time, I was warned by close companions to not reconcile with this friend.

I did not listen. We reconciled, I valued this friend and losing them was just not an option. The pain was unbearable and I yearned for their presence.

*if you have gone through a similar experience be sure to drop a comment*

Now this was a friendship where we hugged and sometimes held hands; kinda tells you how close we were right? They were really vulnerable and acts of affection served as a comfort for them.

Suddenly they got cold. I tried to understand why but they pushed me away  again, again and yet again after so many tries. I wasn't the one to beg, communicate yes but not begging.

So I left them for a while. Others suggested they had romantic feelings and maybe that's why they distanced themselves. It wasn't any surprise or shock or news to me. We used to exchange words of affection; "I love you","I miss you" you know platonically, well...for me.

Mind you it wasn't as if I couldn't develop feelings for this friend I just wasn't interested neither was I ready

Eventually, they suddenly got close to a guy I was talking to. This guy had a severe injury and I was talking to him out of nothing but concern. So both of them got quite close and are still are.

They built this friend group with another guy I was well acquainted with but he too slowly stopped associating with me and I didn't know how to feel.I wasn't sad or angry in the beginning, I just felt empty and confused as to why all this is happening.

I know on my part I tried to make this friendship work and stayed committed to it. It led me to believe that maybe we weren't meant to be or maybe they were the problem.

Also, can you try guessing the gender of this friend?

I am sure that by reading this poem, you would come to understand how they hurt me

A LAMENT FOR LOST FRIENDSHIP

Don't leave me in the woods
we promised each other
I called out for you but you disappeared
I cried out for you but you never appeared.

We were once inseparable
we were one
you screwed with me
I'm stronger now
and that's because I never let the memories stay with you

The wound, it killed me
even if we wanted to we couldn't go back

I've missed you
I've missed you so much
there've been so many things, I've wanted to talk about but you weren't there
sometimes, I really wish you regretted just walking off like that

You can't blame me
you were awful, very awful
and egocentric and harsh and boring
so damn boring

Stay tuned for now. Any suggestions or comments are welcome. 
Thanks for reading💕