My Secret Santa [✔️]

/ E I G H T E E N T H / / C H A P T E R /

"Sabrina," I answer quietly. I go onto my knees to make myself a few inches taller.

"Since when did I ever like Sabrina? I've always had eyes for you," he sounds annoyed.

"Literally last night, you made it pretty clear that you liked her. Did you see the way you held her? Anyone could've assumed that you were both seeing each other privately."

He put his hand around my waist and attracts it towards his upper body. Losing balance on my knees, I fall onto Satoru with one hand around his neck and the other intertwined with one another. "Like this?"

I'm having a hard time speaking my mind when I am positioned the way I am. Every inch of my body is burning up. "I was meant to do it with you but you refused. Remember?"

"I refused because I thought it was a cheap trick to touch me and I stood correctly," I rolled my eyes. "I've seen it happen in way too many films to know that shit is cliché and lame."

"So you knew that I liked you then?"

"No, I knew you how sexually active you were."

"And how would you know such..." he shortens the distance between our faces. Our noses were practically touching. "Private information?"

"My observational skills are unmatched. No one even had to tell me," I gloat.

"Oh yeah?" I could feel his lips break into a smile.

"From the smiling you're making right now to the way you kept trying bending me over at the club, that's all the evidence I need. You're very easy to read." I change my entire position. My left hand is cupping his cheek while my right hand remains on his neck and my low body sits onto his thighs.

"You're dangerous you know that?" He sighs as he leans his head back onto my chest.

"I'm just a tease," I innocently say as I graze my fingers onto his icy snow hair.

"You're torturing me here," he complains.

"I'm the one that's being tortured. I'm the one holding myself. Something happened between the two of you and I can't move past that."

"Sydney, it's not like that. With Sabrina, she was the one inching closer and closer to me as the movie played. She was scared, so I comforted like anyone else would and like she requested me to do beforehand. Had I know that it would've mad you unhappy, I wou-"

"I'm unhappy?" I raise my voice. "You fucking led her on with that stance. I would've assumed you liked me with the way you were acting. That's not what friends do. At least not in our friend group. Also stop with the 'had I' bullshit. You decided to do it in the end, and that's on you. Own up to it."

"Do you seriously only see me as a friend?" My heart clenches as I can feel the atmosphere drastically changing. He is no longer joyful.

"Seeing you as anymore would just bite me in the arse," I can't face him anymore. I hate every single word I'm uttering. "I'm sure the two of you would look great together," I lie.

They probably would look great together but I can't as if I am thrilled about it. It hurts to suffer the one thing you wanted to avoid. I've been rejected multiple times in my life so I should be used to it by now. Why aren't I used to it? Why can't I moved past this easily? Why is he making it so hard to move on? We've only known each other for a few weeks and here I am acting selfish and stubborn.

Pushing him away seems like the better option in the moment. I get off of his lap and widen the distance between us by sitting on the far end of the sofa.

"I don't think I was being clear when I said it, but I want you to know that I like you. Only you and it will not waver whether you hate me or not. I'll let you think things through. If you you've reached a conclusion by then..." he can't finish his sentence. "We'll talk later on today." he pulls off the blanket off of his legs and stood up, stretching his musles out. "Good night," he walks away from me.

Waiting for him to close the door to his room, I go look outside the window to stare at the rainy city as I try not to replay what had just happened.

"Nothing...but bullshit," I mumble.