(un)forgettable

20 Free falling

Mark

Nam waits for me across the road from Soi 99's back door, casually leaning against his black Lexus, looking down at his phone. He's dressed in a beige knit T-shirt and short burgundy shorts, showing off his long pale legs, looking like a model from the sixties.

How come mosquitoes haven't eaten him alive? He must be too toxic even for them.

Nam looks up at the sound of the door closing behind me. He smiles. His face looks so open and honest as if he's happy to see me. As if we are friends.

I already regret ever texting him.

Is it too late to bail out?

"Get in," Nam says, already getting into the car.

Damn.

As I fasten the seat belt, Nam hands me a paper bag. "Here," he says, looking straight ahead and starting the car. '7 Rings' starts playing on Lexie's stereo system. "I thought you might be hungry," Nam says over the 'breakfast at Tiffany's' line. I peek inside the bag. There are two sandwiches carefully wrapped in tissue paper, smelling divine.

"Soi 99 serves food as well," I say tightly, just as my stomach traitorously rumbles.

"You can throw them away. But please, humor me – try one. I want to know what you'll make of them." Nam glances at me, confident and cool as always. But I can't help but see a glimpse of insecure and shy Luc in his half-smile and the way he doesn't look me in the eyes. I guess I just see things I want to see.

I have no idea what I got myself into. I'm clearly out of my depth, and there's no easy way out, so I decide to play it cool. I shrug and bite one of the sandwiches.

Oh, it's so delicious I almost moan. I don't though. I'm not Luc. Luc would definitely go into his food-porn mode over this sandwich. There's crispy, fatty bacon, avocado, fresh lettuce, some nuts, and something sweet. Even the bread is tasty.

"Where did you get them at 4 am?" I ask because Luc should try them too.

Nam smirks. "Good, yeah?" I hum in a vague response. "I made them," he says and throws a careful glance at me again. "Oh, fuck's sake! Don't you dare to frown at them! They are not poisoned. They are absolutely safe to eat. I had one myself while I was waiting for you. And somehow, I'm still alive."

"You... made them..." Well, I'm really trying to be cool and mature. I do. But I'm also kind of shy and disconcerted. "For me?"

"Who else would I meet at four in the morning? Huh?"

"Thanks," I say. For the sandwiches and for agreeing to meet me for God knows what. I don't say that last bit of course. What are we even doing? Should I tell Nam I've never done it before? Or can I fake it? I look at the sandwich in my hand. It looks steady. You can't tell I'm actually shaking in my boots. Maybe if I try hard enough, I'll pass as a cool guy with some experience.

What the fuck am I doing?

Luc would laugh at me if he knew.

Suddenly, I'm so nervous I can't even swallow a piece of bread. I cough, pathetically.

"There's water in the glove compartment," Nam says. Still coughing, I find a bottle of energy drink lying next to a box of tissues. "Trust me," Nam smirks again, "you'll need some extra energy tonight." He winks at me, but I'm paralyzed by fear.

Nam parks at an empty parking lot in front of an office building.

"Come on," he says, getting out of the car.