It Started In The Gym

CHAPTER - 3: Two Paths Converge

The next day, after my workout session, I find myself standing at the entrance of the gym, my feet seemingly glued to the ground. 

The faint smell of disinfectant and sweat fills my nostrils. I can hear my heartbeat in my ears, the pace matching with the rhythmic clank of weights that echo from the inside.

Am I really doing this?

My throat has dried up and I can barely register myself breathing as I anticipate the conversation I am about to have.

Should I talk to him? What would I even say?

I practice speaking whatever I am about to say in a loop in my mind. 

I can almost feel the awkwardness of the conversation before it has even happened.

What if he thinks I was eavesdropping? What if he thinks I'm weird for bringing it up? And worse, what if he gets defensive?

My legs feel like they aren't a part of me, refusing to cooperate. 

I try to will myself to move forward, to go back home. But for some reason, I remain rooted in place.

The idea of striking up a conversation with a complete stranger about something so personal feels too daunting. But a part of me believes that he too is struggling just like I am. And maybe I can help him feel better by sharing my struggles.

Or maybe I'll just embarrass myself.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity, he comes out of the gym.

I take a tentative step forward and approach him.

As I get closer, trying to get the courage to talk, I find my mind racing for sentences to open with, and for some reason at that very moment, my brain refuses to form any coherent sentences.

His gaze is fixed on the ground, and I wonder if he is still replaying his conversation with the trainer from yesterday in his mind.

"Hey," I finally manage to spit out. My voice a little shaky. Oh God, can I hide under a rock? Can I run away, please?

He looks up, surprised. 

His confused eyes meet mine through the lenses of his black-rimmed glasses. "I, um, I just want to start with an apology." I wring my hands, trying to ease my nerves, "I'm really sorry but I kind of overheard what you were talking to the trainer last day."

For a moment, I think I see a flicker of embarrassment cross his face, but he quickly masks it with a small laugh and a hesitant smile. "Yeah?" he replies, sounding more curious than annoyed.

I take a deep breath and just go for it. "It was a total coincidence by the way! I didn't mean to eavesdrop. And.... I just wanted to let you know that I'm going through the same thing," I admitted, feeling a bit more confident now that the words were out. "I've been struggling too. It's hard to keep the motivation going, especially when it feels like you're just spinning your wheels."

He nods, the tension in his shoulders easing slightly. "It's tough," he says softly. "I've been at this for months, and I thought I'd be seeing more progress. But some days..." He shrugs, looking away. "It just feels impossible."

I nod, feeling a sense of relief wash over me. "I know what you mean. For me, it's about proving to myself that I can stick to something. I've always struggled with self-discipline and this... it's like a test I don't want to fail. It's just...you know..... I just wish there was some way to break out of this rut."

He nods slowly, his expression thoughtful. "I get that. Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing something wrong. Like maybe I'm missing something that everyone else seems to get."

"Exactly!" I exclaim, relieved by how easily he gets it. "And it's not just about the workouts. It's the whole thing—diet, motivation, energy levels. Everything is just so....overwhelming."

He laughs lightly, the tension from before not so apparent anymore. "You're telling me. I've tried every diet there is but somehow half of them make me feel worse than when I started and I end up giving it all up".

I laugh, nodding in agreement. "It's comforting to know I'm not alone in this."

He hesitates for a moment and then extends his hand with a slow smile. "By the way, I'm Zayn."

I blink, realizing my oversight. "Oh my God! I'm so sorry, I completely forgot to introduce myself." I extend my hand, laughing nervously. "Nice to meet you, Zayn. I'm Emily."

He chuckles softly. The sound of it eases all my tension. "Nice to meet you too, Emily."

"So, um how long have you been doing this?" Zayn asks, trying to keep the conversation going.

"Coming to the gym? It's been about a month now. But how long have I been struggling with all of this? It's really hard to say. I've been on and off for more than I can remember", I say, my face painted with a bitter smile.

Zayn nods thoughtfully. "I get that. Sometimes I wonder if I'm missing something everyone else seems to have figured out."

"Well," I say after a pause, "at least we're not alone in this. Right?"

"Yeah, it is," he replies. "It's nice to know someone else gets it."

He hesitates, then adds, "You know, it helps to talk about it." His gaze softens as he continues. "Thank you for approaching me".

I nod, a small smile playing on my lips. "Thank YOU for not blowing up on me as I had imagined."

We both share a genuine laugh and for the first time in a while, I don't feel like I'm fighting this battle on my own. There's a silent connection between us, a shared acknowledgment of the struggles we face.

As I glance down at my watch, I realize that time has slipped away faster than I thought. "I should get going," I say, a bit reluctantly. "But it was really nice talking to you, Zayn."

"Yeah, it was," he replies, his smile genuine. "I'm glad we ran into each other."

"Me too." I feel a pang of disappointment as I turn to leave. I don't want it to be the one and only time we talk.

But before I can second-guess myself, I add, "Maybe we could chat again sometime? You know, swap terrible protein shake recipes or something."

His eyes light up as he chuckles softly and nods. "I'd like that. Let's keep in touch."

We exchange numbers, and as I head towards the bus stop, I can't help but feel a little lighter, a little more hopeful. For the first time in a while, it feels like things might be looking up.

As the bus pulls up, I glance back and catch Zayn's eye. He waves, and I wave back, a small smile tugging at my lips.

Maybe this journey doesn't have to be as lonely as I thought.