i guess playa des losers isnt that bad... (noco fanfic)

chapter one - why tf did i get eliminated??

noah pov

now here i am, at playa des losers. i think my team are deaf bitches that voted their smartest person on the team. there are only 2 other people here. the homeschooled freak that has breath as bad as my school garbage bins and the girl in the blue who looks like she eats steak for breakfast and that has the gym as her own home.

is there anyone sane? no.

well im pretty sure its because there are only 3 people here. including me.

i guess instead of think what these freaks think, i just decided to go to my room. room 3? i think its probably because i was the third person eliminated. those bitches. whatever.

still cant make up why i got eliminated. fuck it im just gonna read.

yea... my time in tdi was short. i probably only had like 10 minutes of screentime. oh now i remember when i kissed codys ear. uhm honestly, it was, uhm.

not bad.

i mean it was embarrassing that it was on international television but uhm. so?

I ONLY MEAN THE KISS WAS NOT BAD I DONT LIKE CODY.

anyways. the rooms at the this fancy ass place isnt bad at all. i unpacked my bags and started reading one of the 937 books i brought. 

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after like only 5 hours of reading. it was night. i only finished like 59 long chapter books. 878 left. i heard i doorbell. who the fuck wants to annoy people at fucking 11:43??? i opened the fucking door. it was eva. better then homeschool any day actually! "what do you want" i said.

"uhm so this is like not my personality, but im bored as fuck without izzy. WAIT NO. I DIDNT MEAN TO SAY THAT. FUCK"

"you like izzy? well other then that, im also bored as fuck so i guess?"

"i dont like izzy but alright"

"sure... but im pretty sure izzys watching and hearing because its a hobby of hers"

"fuck it"

we just went to the buffet to have a marshmallow eating contest. eva said that if izzy were here, she'd eat 97 marshmallows. she also said that izzy can burp so strong that it caused a tsunami. yk who can cause a tsunami? owen. im pretty sure that big guy is missing me because just 2 hours i heard him screaming my name. what the fuck.

anyway, talking bout eva and izzy, im pretty sure eva likes izzy.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

"what the actual fuck. why is izzy here" eva said

"OH YEAAAAAAAAAAA SOOOOOO I, UH, USED MY TELEPORTATION POWERS THE TELEPORT INTO THE SKY AND THEN GRABBED A VINE THINGIE AND STARTED SWINGING!!!"

eva and i looked at each other and we all had a marshmallow eating contest together. eva ate 36. i ate, uhm, only 13 because i am not a sweet tooth person. oh yk who is? cody. when the camera crew took a break, he took out like 19 different types of canadian candy. wait why am i think bout him. fuck.

yea izzy actually ate 97 marshmallows. idk how the fuck she did that but i told them im going back to my room. izzy said she also had to go because earlier there was a helicopter chasing her. THEN she used her teleportation. i guess that makes sense? i dont care tho.

i grabbed a drink from the swim up tiki bar and left. 

my myself and i. yay. but i think i miss someone. who? i dont give a fuck.

oh maybe its my vegan, leg-less, unicorn that walked itself down my one story house with stairs, at night, and ate a breakfast of bacon, sausage, eggs, and milk.

uhm. i hear singing from 2 rooms away from me. i know eva is outside doing a 7 mile run. oh i think its homeschool. why didnt chris put sound barriers or something like that. oml fuck.

i went to his room and knocked on the door. "yesssss?" i hate his voice not gonna lie.

"could you like shut the fuck up. its the middle of the fucking night. you dont need to sing. do that tomorrow bitch"

"ehh? fine"

"ugh finally" i muttered.

then, exactly 3 minutes later, i here CALIFORNIA GURLS. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

"YOU COULD TRAVEL THE WORLDDDDD, BUT NOTHING COMES CLOSE THE THE GOLDEN COASTTTTT"

"ONCE YOU PARTY WITH US, YOU WILL BE FALLING IN LOVE. OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH ,OHHHH"

"CALIFORN-"

"could you shut the fuck up? i literally asked you like 3 minutes ago to shut up."

"ehhh, what did you say?"

"to, ahem, SHUT THE FUCK UP"

"ehh"

im pretty sure that meant a fucking no. i slammed the door and he began singing again. i wont get any sleep...

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guess what? it has been a fucking 3 hours. i dont get much sleep in the real world anyway so i dont give a fuck like usual.

after 3 hours, homeschool switched to spooky scary skeletons even tho its FUCKING SUMMER.

i mean, the song is alright but when homeschool sings it, fuck it.

its like 3 or 4 something in the morning. why the fuck doesnt this bitch ass place have a clock in the room. 

i finally found one in the fucking mens bathroom. i'd rather have a clock in my room then in the *cough cough* FUCKING MENS BATHROOM.

i guess i should take a nap or sleep. nah ill read. honestly ill prolly be bored for the next 5 days if no one i like is gonna come. i want big guy to win because he treats me like a "friend". i dont care who i have as friends. 

the only people on the island i liked was owen, izzy, uh and maybe cody. fuck.

honestly i think cody and owen will make it far. not izzy. shes crazy as fuck. 

or maybe she will make it far because she can threaten people to vote vote for her. 

whatever im here. i lost.

i just want to fucking sleep. how do you sleep faster. oml fuck.

i wonder how cody is doing on the island. wait. why do i still care. i only wanna know how he is. im not gay. im not gay. im not gay.

im not gay.

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a/n

this is my first ever book so uhm i understand if its bad as fuck. and its the first chapter anyways.

1027 words.