I'm Not the Guy You're Taking Home | LANDAN ✔

7 : Right

The ringing of his phone woke Daniel up. He groaned, picking up.

"Hello?"

"Daniel..." his heart stopped at the voice. "Will you let me in please? I'm–" he sniffed. "I'm outside your house."

Daniel got out of bed, still not hanging up and headed towards the door.

"Dan, please..."

He opened the door to see Lando with tear-stained cheeks and a phone against his ear. He let out a heart-breaking sob as he saw Daniel.

Daniel hung up, motioning for Lando to come inside.

"Lando, what–"

"Let me– let me talk please."

Daniel closed his mouth, nodding.

"I– I want to do it right this time so just– just bear with me okay?" he took a deep breath. "First off, I'm sorry. I'm– I'm so fucking sorry, Dan..."

Daniel looked at him. "Did you have any alcohol?"

Lando shook his head firmly. "No." he inhaled shakily. "I– this is me, Dan. All me, no alcohol. Because–" he let out a bitter laugh. "Alcohol screwed everything up every time. I tried to make things right with you before. But I just– I can't drink around you o-or I turn into an even bigger mess and I fuck up.

And I want to make it right now, no alcohol." he swallowed. "I– I like you, Daniel. Have for the past year and a half."

Daniel's eyes widened. "Lando–"

"Let me talk." Lando shut his eyes tight. "For so long I thought you were straight. All these years and I never even considered the possibility of you liking guys. And then you– you said you're gay and– all I could think about was how I could have a chance with you. But then I thought; you knew I was gay. This whole time. And you didn't make a move at all. So I figured you weren't interested in me.

And I was so mad, because you took care of me. You helped me all the time. You were nice to me even when I treated you like shit, but you still didn't want me." he swallowed. "Then you gave me a second chance and I set it upon myself to show you that I can be the best friend you deserve but I fucked up again!" he ran his hands through his hair. "And i kept fucking up and I really want to fix it now but I'm– pathetic."

Daniel sighed. "It's two in the morning. You should get some sleep."

Lando shook his head. "No, I need to make things right first."

"Lando," Daniel started softly. "You've apologized. I accept your apology. But you've also confessed. And– I don't know what to believe if I'm being honest with you. You've let me down countless times the past half a year and I don't know if I can ever trust you again. And honestly? I feel like the last choice."

Lando's eyes widened. "No, no, no, you're not the last choice, you're the only choice!"

Daniel sighed. "Go get some sleep and get back to me tomorrow. Okay?"

"But–"

"Go home, Lando." Daniel said firmly, walking past the other and towards his bedroom.

Soon after, he heard the front door close.

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He found himself in his living room the afternoon after again, sitting in the armchair while Lando sat on his couch, both quiet.

Lando looked like he didn't sleep at all last night if the eyebags he was sporting were something to go by. His eyes were red and puffy, his hair a mess and he was still wearing the same clothes as when he came to Daniel last night.

"So, um..." Daniel started, unsure of what to say.

Lando was fidgeting with his hands.

"I hate this."

Lando looked at him, fear present in his eyes. "Wha..."

"We used to be able to tell each other everything. We used to be able to talk everything through but now we're both acting so irrationally. Feelings just screw everything up, don't they?" Daniel huffed out a laugh. He cleared his throat. "What were you expecting to happen when you came here last night?"

Lando looked away and shrugged. "I don't know. I was– sad. And angry with myself for– for hurting you the way I did and... at the time, the only thing I could think about was how I need to make it right and then I was at your house and–" he shook his head, looking down. "I have a feeling I only made things worse..."

Daniel sighed. "I wanted to talk through all the stuff–" he gestured wildly with his hands. "–that's happening bewteen us,  that time I came over. It's probably what hurt me the most; seeing you with a stranger again. I was fucked up and there you were, having already moved on."

Lando nodded. "I'm sorry. I didn't know how to fix things between us. I was lost and I turned to the only thing I knew how to do. And of course it fucked everything up even more."

"Lando," Daniel leaned forward. "What do you want from me right now?"

"I want my best friend back. If I can't have you as anything more. I– I miss you, Dan."

Daniel held eye contact with him for a minute. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah. Let's try again."

Lando breathed out, a huge weight obviously lifted off his chest.

"But," Daniel started. "I won't be going to bars with you. And– I really don't like when you're drunk. You're like... a completely different person."

Lando shook his head. "I won't be going to bars either. It's not something I enjoy. I did it because, just for a little while, I could forget about you and my stupid feelings."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"We will be." Daniel smiled.