↱SEMPITERNAL↲ ⇾seongjoong⇽

four

102nd year of Joseon, Hanyang.

They walk side by side next to the stream, and Hongjoong seems lost in thought.

Four days remain of the time Seonghwa is to spend in Gongju, which means that ten days have gone by, filled to the brim with wandering around Gongju's many roads, eating all the food that the market had to offer.

Seonghwa would read the new books in the library while Hongjoong finished his reading for his lessons, and in the evenings they'd go fishing together or watch the evening performances in town.

Perhaps even just sit by this very stream and share stories of the time they spent without the other.

Sometimes, in these past ten days, Seonghwa would catch Hongjoong staring at him as though he were seeing something for the first time, and it would take everything he had not to flush with embarrassment.

Sometimes, he'd catch himself staring at Hongjoong, because he is seeing this for the first time, his strength and the depth of his voice, the charm in his smile that goes beyond just those beautiful teeth, something in his eyes, in his demeanor, something older and more mature than he remembers.

And it would take everything he had not to flush with embarrassment.

Sometimes he would find his heart hammering for no reason.

When Hongjoong would read him beautiful poetry about love and loss, like that day when he read out Hwang Jin I – I will break the back of this long midwinter night, folding it double, cold beneath my spring quilt, that I may draw out the night, should my love return – and Seonghwa found their eyes meeting and all the air leaving his chest to make room for an emotion so overwhelming he didn't know what to do with it.

Or when he'd take him by the hand and run through the wheat fields, and Seonghwa would inexplicably find himself thinking back to a memory two years old, the day Hongjoong kissed his cheek out of the blue, and he'd laugh it off, fighting the tremble in his voice and the twisting in his stomach.

Sometimes he'd find his chest tight for no reason, like when they met that pretty girl at the market, from a family passing through Gongju on their way south.

Like when she smiled at Hongjoong and blushed prettily, and he spoke to her and her chaperone, charming like Seonghwa has never seen him.

He seems so grown up now, he'd think, and brush it all off.

Seonghwa looks over at Hongjoong, frowning and focused on the ground at his feet.

He wonders what he's thinking about so deeply, lines etched into his fair forehead, his arms behind his back, his lips a thin line.

"What are you thinking about?" he asks. "You're going to stare a hole into the ground."

Hongjoong starts.

He chuckles, and stops walking.

"Nothing," he says. "Just the thought of you leaving."

"The thought of me leaving?" Seonghwa repeats. "It has you frowning like you've just lost your home?"

Hongjoong stares at him, that same stare, as if he's seeing something for the first time, wordless and unwavering.