Her heart's dilemma (WLW)

Cigar

Asher woke up slowly, her mind still hazy from sleep. As she blinked her eyes open, she became aware of the warmth beside her and the comforting weight of Sydney's arm around her waist. Her breath caught in her throat as she realized she had been holding Sydney close in her sleep, her body naturally drawn to her.

For a moment, Asher stayed still, her heart pounding in her chest. The softness of Sydney's body against hers felt so right, yet she was filled with a familiar anxiety. Memories from her past flashed through her mind—of how her friends back home would often push her away or make uncomfortable comments whenever she showed any affection. They had told her it felt strange, that they didn't like her "like that." It had always stung, leaving Asher feeling awkward and out of place.

Now, lying here with Sydney, she feared she had crossed a line. What if Sydney felt the same way? What if she was uncomfortable? Panic began to rise in her chest, and Asher knew she needed to move. Slowly, carefully, she started to disentangle herself from Sydney, doing her best not to wake her. She gently lifted Sydney's arm and slid out of bed, holding her breath as she did so.

Once she was free, Asher stood by the bed for a moment, watching Sydney sleep peacefully. She looked so calm and serene, completely unaware of the turmoil going on in Asher's mind. Asher bit her lip, her chest tightening with worry and guilt. She didn't want to ruin whatever friendship or bond they were starting to build.

Feeling overwhelmed, Asher quietly made her way to the small balcony just outside her room. She slid the door open as quietly as possible, stepping out into the cool morning air. The city was just beginning to wake up, the soft sounds of Parisian life drifting up from the street below.

She reached into a small space in the balcony just enough to lay her cigarettes, pulling out a stick with shaky hands. Lighting it, she took a deep drag, trying to calm her racing thoughts. The smoke filled her lungs, and she exhaled slowly, watching the tendrils dissipate into the crisp air. Her mind was a whirlwind of emotions—fear, embarrassment, and a hint of something else she couldn't quite place.

As she leaned against the railing, looking out over the rooftops, she couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness. She had been so happy last night, so at ease with Sydney, and now she was worried she had ruined it. Her heart ached at the thought of making Sydney uncomfortable or pushing her away.

Asher took another drag of her cigarette, trying to steady herself. She needed to figure out how to navigate this without losing what she had with Sydney. The last thing she wanted was to be rejected again, to feel like she didn't belong. She just wanted to be close to someone who understood her, who accepted her for who she was.

With a sigh, Asher flicked the ash off the end of her cigarette, her eyes still fixed on the horizon. She hoped that when Sydney woke up, things wouldn't be awkward. She hoped they could go back to the easy camaraderie they had shared the night before. But for now, all she could do was wait and hope for the best.