I Think I Just Legalized Love

1

If you need to know now, my name is Jason Sheen. I am 15-years-old. I am atheist. I keep this a secret from my parents. They are not religious, but they do follow and believe in things from the Bible. I haven’t told them I don’t like religion and that I take myself as atheist because they would probably kill me.

            No, actually. I don’t mind religion. I just don’t want to have to follow some of the rules and I don’t believe in God so what would I do if I had to say things at something to God? It’s very uncomfortable because I feel as though I am praying or whatever to an imaginary man. Who made God a man anyway? Why not a woman? Why do people believe in a man in the sky watches the world and punishes the sinful? If God did do that, why have the people who have sinned not gone to hell?

            Anyway, I brought up my family and this religion thing to tell you that my parents are obsessed with gays. I don’t mean they say, “I love gay people” or “love is love no matter what” or “gay people should be allowed to marry.”  I mean that they say, “Gays are the definition of sin” and “gays are so annoying” and “don’t gays know that they can’t have children?”

            I bring this stuff up because, in fact, I am gay.

            I bet you’re wondering: Is your favorite color pink? Do you play with dolls? Are all your friends girls? Do you wear women’s clothing? No, no, no and no. Those are stereotypical assumptions. I am none of those. My favorite color is red, I hate dolls, I do not have friends, and I wear men’s cloths. Now I bet you got lost when I said I had no friends, right? Nope.

            All that happened was that I told the truth. I was being honest, like I always am – lying gets you nowhere. I was at school, happily talking to a friend (yes a boy) and then the bell rang for class to start. It was guidance, which was a class for talking about serious issues. We had it once a week, last period on Fridays. The peer counselors, who instruct the class, decided to talk about gay rights and how homosexuals are just like regular people, and then things like how some religious people are blah, blah, blah. They asked people if anyone was homosexual, and since I don’t lie, I stood up like they said I should do.

            Everyone in the class stared at me in disbelief. I regretted admitting I was gay, and I knew this would affect me a lot. I didn’t really think it would go too far though. I heard chuckles the room. The peer counselors smiled, but the rest of the people just sat there laughing. I heard my friend laughing the hardest. I threw his things off the desk and left the room.

            I went home right after that.

            The day after that happened Rob, my friend, didn’t talk to me. He avoided me actually. Everyone, even people I didn’t know, started bullying me. I guess my class told everyone. The bullying is especially bad when it came to the one guy in the school who’s always the bully. Every school has one. In my case his name was Ryan. Ryan was captain of the football team. It was that kind of old school bully on TV and in books. Captain of the football team, girls always flirt with him, he’s the bully, yet he is loved by teachers.

            Anyway, Ryan got to know where my locker was, and my schedule. I don’t know how he found out, but I guess Rob did because he was the only one who knew my exact schedule.

            I think I’ll just start saying things in present tense.

            Beep, beep, beep, beep. I smash my alarm clock with my fist and sit up. I rub my eyes and get the sleep out. I put on a pair of jeans and an All Time Low shirt. They’re my favorite band. I get on my grey sweat jacket, and walk downstairs for breakfast.