Mine, my beloved (On Hold)

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Ganga

On the following dawn, mama came to our home and was conversing with my parents. My siblings have left for school just a few minutes before his arrival but I'm yet to depart. I woke up quite delayed today and as a result, I'm a bit late in leaving for the bus stop.

However, I'm happy that I got to meet my mama before going to college. Currently, I'm standing near a pillar with my moderately wet tresses cascading down my shoulder. I was grooming myself to attend college when I heard Mama's voice from the lounge. And my poor heart didn't let me finish my work, instead it dragged me to behold my mama...

The person who has owned it—my heart.

While he was speaking with my parents, he slightly glanced my way and again resumed his conversation. It was enough for me. That one little glance—it calms my being.

With a gentle expression, I kept looking at his beauty which was enhanced by the khaki button-up shirt and black pants...

"I'll be going then," minutes later, he expresses it to my parents who nod their heads at him with a smile. It is agonizing to even entertain the thought of letting him go but I've no choice. All I could do was bid him bye with a smile...

And I did that as he hopped inside his car and drove off. He didn't particularly stare at me, given that my parents were there—but I know he noted me and he's pleased by the smile on my countenance.

Once he goes by, a grim mood hugs me and I hurriedly saunter inside my home to prepare myself to run to the bus stop. Later, when I exist next to Maalini—awaiting the bus, I was completely dejected. It led me to repel whatever that was Maalini saying to me non-stop...

While I was submerged in sorrow, all of a sudden, a car pulled to a stop in front of me. The glimmering white car belongs to none other than my mama. I was taken aback by his presence and as he lowered the glass of the passenger seat next to the driver's one to peer at me—I almost had a heart attack.

He was calmly gazing at me and then, he leaned from the driver's seat to open the door of the passenger one. "Come in," I was beyond shocked.

"Go, get in Ganga!" Maalini compels me and pushes me a little with a wink—unbeknownst to the worry that floods my head.

I, with an anxious face, observed the environment and found every person there regarding the unfolding scene. Some were my Father's friends and If I were to get inside Mama's car, they would view it wrongly and tell a twisted scenario to my parents which would ultimately lead to my father being disappointed and bashed.

I can't let that happen...

Though he's my cousin, going with him alone in public is prohibited. Besides, I'm not a school kid anymore to casually wander with him all the time. The thoughts that would born in the people's minds If I now hop in would not be innocent.

I know the people here. Many are very judgemental when it comes to the matters between a boy and a girl.

I don't want to become prey to that. I could never tolerate it If I bring shame to my parents. Thus I decided to deny Mama. "No mama, I can't come," I softly shut the door and leaned a bit down to talk with him.

He peeks at me with a pinch of anger...

"The people might speak badly of us mama..." I tried to explain and make him understand but he acted unbothered. "Let them talk whatever they want! Ain't I the one who's going to marry you? Then why do you care about those people's words?" He utters with a string of fierceness.

"Still mama..." I drag, unconvinced.

"Will you come with me or not?" He asks in a conclusive tone. "If there aren't people around, I would've come with you, mama. But now I cannot...sorry mama," As I say that, his countenance exhibits extreme rage.

I gulp at the look on his face and before I can state anything further, he swiftly drives away.

I straighten myself as I watch him ride rashly. Why couldn't he comprehend my concerns? If I'll go with him now, someone will definitely disclose this to my father. And it would surely cause distress to my parents. Though they would wed me to my mama, roaming around with him before marriage is not something my parents are fond of...

Hence it's for the best If I stay low.

But now Mama has become indignant and the sad thing is he's leaving for Bangalore today...

How do I soothe my mama now?

"Why didn't you go with him?" Maalini questions with a confused look on her face. "Everyone's watching...they would speak wrongly of us," she quickly grips the matter and lends me an understanding gaze.

"Right, I'm sorry Ganga...I didn't think of it before," I shake my head at her. "It's okay, but I feel so bad now. He's going to the city today and I've made him disheartened and furious with me..." I declare my feelings in a low tone.

"He'll understand you, Ganga! Just contact him and speak," as she claims that, I quickly retract my phone from the backpack and ring him expectantly.

He cut the call.

I tried again and he again does the same.

"He disconnects the call," I voice out to Maalini with a perturbed mien. "...is he a short-tempered person?" I nod at her. "Sometimes yes...he easily becomes furious and it would take time for him to calm down," Maalini offers me an uncertain look.

"That's tough to deal with," she sighs.

Forthwith, the bus comes by and we get in silently. Throughout the ride, I stayed numb and Maalini provided me soft squeezes on my palm to comfort me.

Yet I wasn't okay.

I'm extremely unsettled and nervous by what happened just a few minutes ago...

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