In This Place

Standing in the Fire

                                                       "In my heart it's still the night"—Nil se'n la

"Really good" was quite an understatement. A while back, Kris had told her that people acted "weird" around her once they heard her play. Cory had heard her play plus read the reviews and realized, with a dull sense of horror, she was feeling weird and maybe a little starstruck. Switcher would say she was "fan-girling." Cory felt her own face grow red.

"Yes. Yes, they are. I've...just nev...never heard them read out loud. They sound so...so...grandiose. It's...embarrassing. I...I...can't listen to...to...anymore right now. I...need to turn my...my...phone...back on."

Kris paused for a moment and studied herself in the mirror.

"If...if...there's any bad re...reviews out...out there, my mother will...will...tell me. I...embarrassed her...her...in public. I...I...think it's her...her...worst fear."

"No. She embarrassed herself in public. Big difference." Cory closed the laptop and got off the bed. She wanted to say something of significance. Something that could remove the stoic look from Kris's face and replace it with a smile and maybe even a sense of hope that everything was going to turn out okay. Instead, a haunting thought rose in her mind, dark and unbidden.

...a shallow grave somewhere in the desert...

...and that image of her Colt .45 Competition Series handgun, Cory had picked it out personally, and she hadn't even known why but it was a pretty piece, and she hadn't given any thought to how everything affects everything, all she had thought and still thought was how falling might be the best part of the whole senseless climb.

Whenever she picked it up, the weight of it always felt right in her hands.

"Cory? Are...you okay?"

Kris' soft hand rested against her face, and Cory felt the warmth—the life—nestled against her cheek.

It's not about making easier for her; it was about making it easier for Kris

"I'm fine, sweetheart. But...you don't control your mother's actions. She chose to do what she did last night. She embarrassed herself. Okay? Remember that." Cory tried to smile.

"I'm...I'm gonna try to."

"So...turn your phone back on, just get it out of the way, then we'll go get some food, sound good?"

"All...ex...except the turning on...on...the phone part." Kris replied. Cory took in her hangdog walk as she went over to her nightstand and picked up her phone.

This should be interesting

"Do you want me to check it first?" Cory asked.

"I do but...but...I need to do this. I need to. What did my...my...mom say? I'm...I'm all grown up now." There was bitterness in the statement.

"Sage words from someone who has never grown up herself. Kris, I hate to say this but...there's something wrong with your mother. Something mentally wrong. She needs some help." Cory stated then cautiously watched Kris's face.

Knowing your mother was crazy as fuck and then having someone say it out loud were two different things. But the ever-stoic expression Kris had mastered God only knows how long ago had already slid into place.

Kris turned her phone on and stared down at the screen. She looked up at Cory with grievous eyes.

"My...my...daddy called. Sev...several...ti...times."

"Well, call him back sweetheart." Cory struggled to keep her voice calm.

Jesus God, what was it like to be so locked into yourself??