Catch me if I Fall (by MysteriousMidnight on ao3)

Solid ground

From up high, the world looked so small. Yet it all felt big and overwhelming. He felt small - small and insignificant, and like he didn't matter. No one would miss him if he just...

His grip on the branch slackened. He stepped a little further away from the trunk, where the branch was thinner and less likely to hold his weight. It shook below him. Or maybe he was shaking, not the branch.

He closed his eyes, heart thudding in his chest.

This was it.

"Um, what the fuck are you doing?"

Evan startled, eyes widening in shock. He lost his balance, flailing wildly.

"Shit!"

At the last second, he caught himself, falling back against the trunk. He sank down, his legs shaking too hard to hold him up any longer.

"Fuck! Are you okay?"

That voice again. He couldn't understand why they were talking to him, couldn't understand why anyone was out there at all. He'd purposely picked a tree deep in the forest where not many people ventured. Why was someone interrupting his well-thought out plan? One that would look like an accident, and hurt his mom less?

He looked down, searching for the owner of the voice.

Holy shit.

Connor Murphy stood below, peering up at him with an annoyed look on his face.

"I...." Evan swallowed hard, clearing his throat. He wasn't sure when he'd started crying - when he'd made the decision to let go? Or in that moment when he thought he was going to fall and die?

"Can you, like, get down okay?" Connor asked him, frowning. "Or should I get someone?"

"No... I'm, um, I'm fine." He resigned himself to living another day, slowly climbing back down until his feet hit solid ground.

"What the fuck, dude?"

Evan frowned at Connor. He didn't know much about him, just what the rumors said. But based on the rumors, Evan felt like he should be afraid of the boy who stood before him. But... he wasn't.

Maybe it was because Evan was so depressed, it overwhelmed his fight or flight instincts. Maybe it was because Connor looked... relaxed. More relaxed than usual. Not that Evan saw him that often. But the few times he'd passed him in the halls, Connor had looked tense and angry. Right now he looked... calm, but also concerned. Which was even more weird...

"I was just... I like to, um, climb trees?" Evan cringed. It sounded SO pathetic. "Sorry. Um, so... I guess I just... I mean... I wasn't paying attention, I guess. I just... walked too far out and lost my grip."

Connor blinked at him. "You weren't paying attention...? You were climbing a fucking tree and just decided to not pay attention to what you were doing?"

Evan shrugged, staring down at his feet. His fingers played with the fraying edges of his shirt. "I guess."

"I... am too high for this," Connor admitted, shaking his head. "Well, glad you're safely back on the ground, I guess." He flopped down under the tree, resting his back against it and pulling out a joint from his pocket.

Evan stood there awkwardly. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to do now. Connor Murphy had just interrupted his suicide attempt... What did one do after a failed attempt? It's not like he'd done this before. Did he just go about his day as usual? Did he go home?

"Did you... need something?" Connor asked. He took a drag from the joint, holding the smoke in for a minute before blowing it out.

Evan shook his head. "No, sorry.." He looked down at his sneakers.