𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 ♡ Sirius Black

CH 11 - This is not Goodbye

November 1, 1981 - night

I sit hunched in the corner of the cramped living room, every nerve on edge, my head pounding with the dull, persistent ache of a hangover. The air feels heavy, almost too thick to breathe, and my throat is as dry as sandpaper. Reaching into my pocket, my fingers brush against the small joint I stuffed there earlier. For a fleeting second, the temptation to leave the room-just for a moment-is strong. Anything to calm the jittering inside me. But I don't. I don't need another reason for Moody to look at me sideways.

Instead, I clench my fists in my pocket.

And wait.

Moody paces back and forth, his face set in a grim scowl, his magical eye whirling like mad, scanning every corner of the room as if Death Eaters are going to barge in at any second.

To my left, Emmeline Vance sits stiffly in the armchair, her hands clasped tightly together, knuckles white. Dedalus Diggle is slumped on the sofa, looking more defeated than I've ever seen him. Alice and Frank Longbottom sit close together on the opposite side of the room, silent, clinging to each other as though afraid to let go. No one speaks. No one even dares to breathe too loudly.

Every second feels like an eternity. The joint burns a metaphorical hole in my pocket as I struggle to keep still. I bite my lip, squeezing my eyes shut for a moment, trying to push away the sickening swirl of nausea and grief twisting in my gut. The pounding in my skull makes it hard to think straight, and the noises in the room are too much and not enough all at once.

It's only been a few hours since the rumours started, but it feels like a lifetime. My stomach churns at the thought of it-James and Lily. Gone. Merlin, please, don't let it be true. But deep down, I already know it is. I felt it the moment I heard. Something inside me broke.

The door creaks open, and we all jump, heads snapping towards it. Chris steps inside, and the look on his face tells me everything. His hair's a mess, his robes wrinkled, and his eyes are haunted. That same damn look he gave me when Dad died. And Robbie.

"Is it true? Are they dead?" Moody's voice slices through the silence.

Chris closes the door behind him, leaning against it for a moment as though gathering himself. His eyes flicker to mine, and my stomach drops, a weight settling in my chest.

"The Ministry has just confirmed it, yes," Chris says, his voice low. "James and Lily are dead."

All of us react at once.

Emmeline gasps softly, her hand flying to her mouth. Alice lets out a small, choked sob and buries her face in Frank's shoulder. Dedalus makes a sound-a kind of strangled, broken noise.

I squeeze my eyes shut for a moment, trying to hold myself together. But it's like the world's caving in around me. James and Lily... gone. Just like that. I want to scream, to break something, to do anything to stop the overwhelming emptiness that threatens to swallow me whole.

Moody's voice cuts through the fog in my mind. "And Harry? What about the boy?"

Chris straightens, his face hardening. "He's safe. Dumbledore is making the necessary arrangements as we speak."

I snap my eyes open, unable to hold back. "Necessary arrangements?" I hear myself say, my voice coming out sharper than I intended. Everyone turns to look at me, but I don't care. "What do you mean, 'necessary arrangements'? Where's Harry? And where's Sirius? He's his godfather. Has he got Harry?"

Chris's face tightens, and I see him glance at me like I'm some fragile thing. "Ellie, I need you to calm down."

"Calm down?" I stand up too quickly, swaying for a moment as the blood rushes to my head. The room spins, and for a moment, I think I might actually be sick. "Where's Sirius, Chris? Where is he?"