Dear Diary (Maxley)

8

"What are you doing here?" Brad's tail is wagging furiously behind him, how cute.

"I wanted to walk you to your next class." Max sheepishly rubs his neck when Brad's eyes dart away, "Only if you want me to-"

"Hm." Brad looks him up and down, noticing his unusually neat hair and clothes. What's he trying to do? Impress him? He smiles at the thought but scowls when he sees Max admiring his grin, "Fine but we're going to go get coffee."

"What kind?" Max's head crooks to the side and Brad has to stop himself from cupping his face and kissing him. "You like frappe's right?"

"How did you know that?" Brad raises a brow when Max's tail slowly waves side to side, leaning over when he looks away. "Answer me."

"I asked Tank a few questions about what you like a few days ago." He usually doesn't see Max blush, his face reddening when Brad takes his hand.

"Ask me next time." All Brad says while pulling Max along, ignoring the stares of their peers.

Brad's coffee order is long and complicated, Max's head on his shoulder as the brunette orders for them. He wanted to pay but Brad wouldn't let him, defiantly swiping his card. They sit in a small booth a few feet apart, awkwardly shuffling in their seats. Brad takes small sips of his coffee, fingers tapping the table, oblivious to the turmoil in Max's mind. What should he say? He already apologized but it still didn't feel like enough, nothing did! He had been bringing Brad flowers and candy for the past few weeks, visiting his room every so often to...cuddle. They hadn't discussed the fact that they were mated, Max wasn't sure how to bring it up and it didn't even seem like it was on Brad's mind. How was he so calm about it when Max's heart was hammering in his chest, the alpha's mind thinking about all the rumors he knew were swirling around about them. Lovers, it has a nice ring to it.

"What's the matter?" Brad leans in, smirking when Max's eyes drop to his lips. "You're so obvious, you know that? If you want a kiss just ask."

"Can I have a kiss?" Max perks up when Brad scoots closer.

"No."

Max frowns and Brad bursts into a fit of laughter, patting Max's cheek until it blooms red again. How is he supposed to look mad when Brad looks so happy? His eyes are squinted, pearly whites bright between two pink lips. Max decides to steal a kiss, smirking when Brad jumps and grins mischievously at him. He gives Max's ear a small tug to pull him closer, kissing his cheek before pushing him away and standing. Max pulls him back down, eyes widening when Brad lands on his lap as if he wasn't the one who put him there. He freezes, Brad's gaze cold but his hands warm on Max's chest.

"Really? In public?" Brad lets his hands trail up to Max's shoulders, "How scandalous."

"I didn't mean to-"

"You're very accident prone." Brad smiles so sweetly as if he isn't letting his lips graze Max's mouth, "I'll have to keep you close to keep you out of trouble. How's that sound?"

"Good." Max rests his head between Brad's chest, arms tightening around the brunette's waist. "I like being mated to you."

"For now." Brad plays with his hair until it's messy again, the way it's supposed to be. "What are you going to do when you get tired of me?"

"That's not going to happen." Max says with a small shrug, burying his face in Brad's chest. If their seats weren't so secluded he'd get lectured, but Brad decided to let him have his moment. "I promise."

As if he'd believe a promise from an Alpha.

Brad waits for Max to get bored of him but weeks pass and he's still just as clingy, Brad's room basically his and the Gammas treating Max like a roommate. At first he was irritated by Max inviting himself over but he was impossible to say no to when he'd give Brad those big puppy eyes and promise to be quiet. Spoiler, Max was never quiet, always rambling to Brad about Powerline or whatever hyperfixation he was currently stuck on. Brad found himself listening instead of studying, head on his hands and mind chewing on every word Max pushed out of his mouth. Max notices and his words start to falter, heart hammering in his chest because of Brad's soft gaze. He always does this, look at Max with those beautiful blue eyes until he's tripping over his own feet. It doesn't help that Brad always does little things like move a spare strand of hair out of Max's eyes or fix Max's collar when he wears button-ups to match Brad. Now here they were again, sitting in silence and admiring each other in the confines of Brad's room.

"Hey." Brad's voice is low but his head held high as he takes Max's hand, "Like what you see?"

"Always." Max kisses his knuckles, smiling when Brad's face flushes. "Especially when you're in my clothes."

"Don't get too used to this." Brad slides onto Max's lap, a habit he's decided not to change. Max's hoodie is all he's wearing besides his boxers, no point in staying dressed if Max is spending the night again.

He knows what he's here for- it can't be anything else but that.

"You always say that as if you're going somewhere." Max kisses his cheek before his lips dip down his neck, pausing over the mark that still had yet to fully heal. "Are you sure you don't need to go to the doctor? It's been a bit since-"

"Don't worry about it." Brad knows why it hasn't healed but there's no way he'll tell Max, no way in hell. Well, not until he's one-hundred percent sure at least. Mating isn't always simple, alright?! Max bit him but he didn't bite back and now things were complicated!

"I can't just not worry." Max wraps an arm around Brad's waist, he doesn't need two. Tiny, Max likes holding it. His hands are always hesitant, sometimes shaky because Brad's responses always vary. "I care about you, I love-"

"It's getting late, Max." He never lets him finish his confessions, always dismissing them with a wave of his hand. "Are you staying over again?"

"Do you want me to?" Max shrinks away, sheepishly rubbing his neck. "I know you don't really like when I linger around."

"I never said that."

"You don't have to."

Silence.

"Stay if you want to, but don't feel obligated to." Brad quickly lays down and pulls his blanket over his head, curling up. "Goodnight."

"...Goodnight."

Max doesn't stay.

Brad's not sure why he didn't- He's not sure why he didn't know Brad wanted him to stay. He really wanted him to, he couldn't sleep without him anymore. Text him? No way! He didn't want to seem desperate and it's not like Max was blowing up his phone. Brad glances at his journal, the little book now foreign since it's been so long since he's written in it. Lonely, it's the only thing on his bedside table besides a tiny lamp. He picks it up, grabs a pen from his desk, and sits crossed-legged on his bed as he scribbles his thoughts.

It's been a while, I know, alright? I'll just write everything that's happened since I lost this thing:

-Max and I are mated(Yay?) (I made sure to take a suppressant, at least I remember taking one. It's not like I'll get pregnant from one or two times. He only knotted the first time anyway, all other times he just...doesn't put it in.) 

-Max is mad at me(I think)

-Max keeps trying to use the L word (Too soon)

-I didn't bite him back and now our union isn't complete, I need to hurry up and decide if I'm ready before my next heat! Seriously, this isn't a choice to take lightly. Max doesn't have a social standing besides being an Alpha and a skater boy, mother and father aren't going to easily accept him. Even if I don't bite back we're still mated now that he broke through my scentpads... all I can really do is get them removed but I don't want to. 

Brad finishes writing and sets the book aside, staring up at his ceiling and hugging himself. His room still smells like Max, the hoodie on his skin warm and soft. He pulls the sleeves over his hands and takes a long inhale, head spinning as Max's scent puts him in a daze. This hoodie is the only comfort he has for a while, days pass and they've barely said a word to each other, not even goodmorning and goodnight texts like before. Brad stews on the sudden distance, anxiety swirling in his stomach but not enough to make him reach out.

Not until he gets a call from the Alpha, one where he can tell something is wrong.