19| Dinner Party &

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I rub at my temples, lost in thought from distant memories threatening to take over my mind.

I'm not sure why my brain is deciding that now's a great time to resurface the ghosts of my past but trying to freshen myself up while my brain fails me is not going well. The past I desperately try to forget must remain hidden until I can lay awake at night and ponder on the Monroe family. As I usually do around this time of year.

For now, however, I need to finish washing my face and get my ass back downstairs to greet Theo's guests—our guests.

He told me not to worry about the tiny furballs until after dinner, to which he expertly snuck past the crowd in the kitchen and back to the safety of his bedroom. As I did too.

I splash my face with warm water and pat it dry with a hand towel, not wanting to smear off any more of my mascara. No raccoon eyes are a good enough sign for me.

I decided to keep the dress I had on before and opt for a pair of socks instead of sandals. Now that I have properly prepared myself for more acting, I turn the lights off in my room and exit out the door.

Just as I'm about to turn down the hall that leads to the stairs, Theo joins me. He's waiting for me by the start, his muscular silhouette leaning on the rail like a statue. Once I catch his eye he smiles.

I assume he's happy to have another person to pawn off on the company that waits for us. I know I would.

"Are you ready?" Theo asks me.

I nod, linking our hands together like it's become natural, "Let's go pretend our asses off."

Theo's smile twitches slightly, with what I'm guessing is him holding back laughter, "Lead the way."

With our hands intact I take the lead down the stairs; Theo follows me only a step behind. As we descend the spiral, my mind wonders. I don't usually feel anxious over a lot of things, and I can keep a level head in a lot of pressuring situations.

But the idea of trying to convince some of Theo's close friends—family—that this relationship is real, is weighing down on my confidence. I knew I would have to eventually, but not so soon.

Well, the way I need to see it, if I can convince myself of feelings that clearly aren't there by a three-second kiss, then I can convince anyone.

On the last step, my anxiety calms and the thrill of acting takes over.

I've done this countless times. I've perfected the art of a mask long before I ever started acting in small plays. Compared to the intensity of a life-or-death situation, this is nothing.

We round the kitchen, and the backs of five heads are what greet us as we approach. They're all lost in their own world as they bicker about what's missing from some kind of sauce that bubbles on the stove.

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⏰ Last updated: Sep 29 ⏰

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