my seven for your three.

the beginning. (heaven is a bedroom)

Lainey's bedroom wasn't the pastel dream it used to be. The once-pink walls were now covered in posters of faded bands, magazine clippings, and graffiti-style doodles. The frills had been replaced by black bed sheets, the heart-shaped pillows long gone. Lainey sat on the edge of her unmade bed, her knee bouncing restlessly as she chewed on her chipped black nail polish.

May was sitting on the floor, legs crossed, staring blankly at the cracked window. The air felt thick with tension—unspoken, but heavy. Bianca leaned against the wall, hands shoved into the pockets of her ripped jeans, tossing an empty soda can between her hands.

"I'm done with these pointless sleepovers," Bianca muttered, breaking the silence. "We're not kids anymore. If we're gonna sit around in the dark, we might as well be doing something about the stuff that's actually screwing us up."

May flinched, her mind racing with memories she'd been trying to push down all night. Bianca's right. Sitting here won't change anything. The scars on her body itched just thinking about it. Her ex-girlfriend Eleanor, the fight, the bullying—it was all like a weight she couldn't shake. And from the look on Lainey's face, she wasn't the only one carrying baggage they couldn't leave behind.

Lainey finally spoke up, her voice low, almost resigned. "So what, Bianca? We pack up and drive out to confront every nightmare we've buried?" She smirked, though it didn't reach her eyes. "This isn't a movie, you know."

Bianca pushed off the wall, her eyes dark and serious. "Yeah, maybe it's not. But I'm not gonna sit around while my life gets trashed by things we haven't dealt with. Let's take a road trip and actually deal with it, face-to-face." Her eyes darted between May and Lainey. "Your trailer, May's ex, my own mess. All of it."

May swallowed hard, the mention of Eleanor making her feel like she couldn't breathe. She glanced at Lainey, who was biting her lip, staring off like she was trying to convince herself this wasn't a terrible idea.

"I don't know," May mumbled, her voice shaky. "Going back to all that... I don't think we're ready."

Lainey let out a sharp breath. "We'll never be ready. That's the point, right? You think I wanna go back to that trailer? Or see the mess I left behind with my parents?" Her hands clenched into fists on her lap. "But sitting here, pretending we're okay when we're not... it's a lie. And I'm sick of lying."

Bianca nodded, stepping closer. "So let's stop lying. We're not okay. None of us. But if we do this, we do it together. We confront it head-on. I'm done running from it, and I think you are too."

May's heart pounded in her chest. She hated thinking about the past, especially Eleanor, but Bianca's words struck something deep inside her. Running had never helped her before, and it wasn't going to help her now.

"What if... what if we just screw everything up more?" May asked, her voice soft, almost pleading.

Lainey's gaze softened for a second before her usual hard expression returned. "It's already screwed up. So what's left to lose?"

Silence filled the room, thick and oppressive. May could feel the weight of the decision pressing down on all of them. The idea of confronting her past terrified her, but the thought of never doing it—of living with the constant, gnawing fear—seemed even worse.

Bianca crouched down in front of May, her eyes intense. "I'm not saying this will fix everything, but we owe it to ourselves to try. To stop being scared, even if it's just for a little while."

May bit her lip, her mind racing. The scars on her body, the memories of Eleanor, the constant shame she couldn't shake—they all screamed at her to stay hidden, to keep quiet. But Bianca was right. They couldn't hide forever.

"Okay," May whispered, finally nodding. "We'll do it. We'll face everything."

Lainey nodded, more resolved now, though the lightness she used to carry was long gone. "But we do it our way. No cheesy therapy crap. No half-measures. If we're gonna dig up all this pain, we need to be ready to see it through."

Bianca grinned, though there was nothing happy in it. "Deal."

They all sat there for a moment, the enormity of what they'd just agreed to hanging over them like a storm cloud. They were going to confront their pasts—physically, face-to-face. Lainey's toxic parents, May's ex, Bianca's own mess—it was all waiting for them.

May's stomach churned, but there was no backing out now. They'd made a pact, and there was no turning back.

The next morning, they gathered in the kitchen, packing whatever they thought they'd need for the road. Lainey's Nana sat at the table, watching them with wary eyes.

"Where are you girls headed?" Nana asked, her voice sharp with suspicion.

Lainey didn't bother looking up from her backpack as she stuffed in a few clothes. "Just going out for a bit. We need some time."

Nana frowned, glancing between them. "Going out where? This isn't some trip to the park, Lainey. What are you up to?"

Bianca shot a glance at May, who felt her stomach twist. They hadn't planned on telling anyone the truth—not even Nana. Lainey shrugged, not bothering to sugarcoat it. "We're just going. Don't wait up."

Nana's frown deepened. "You girls be careful out there. It's a dangerous world, especially if you go looking for trouble."

"We'll be fine, Nana," Lainey reassured, bouncing on her toes. "Promise."

Nana gave a slow, thoughtful nod. "Alright, then. Just make sure you stick together."

May felt a shiver run down her spine as those words echoed through her mind. Stick together.

May followed Lainey out the door, her hands shaking as they loaded their stuff into Lainey's parents' old car. They were about to face things they'd spent years avoiding, and the weight of that decision felt crushing.

Lainey slid into the driver's seat, her jaw tight as she fired up the engine. The loud rumble filled the air, drowning out any doubts that May might have had.

They were doing this. Together.

Whether it destroyed them or not.

(this first chapter is kinda weak haha; they get better, I swear!! especially chapter three *wink wink* -xoxo, charlie)