the penis factory

part 2: the part where he gets caught by the penis people

i went to guy collage and then home one day. there were a lot of squrrels that day and i wondered why there were so many of them. i was eating my lunch in the bathroom of the collage school because i am a nerd and get bully a lot. they call me bad names like big dumb idiot with big penis. i cry as i eat my tuna salad i took from home. i am extra sad because it was extra warm. i sit on toilet and hear a noise and see a squrrel in bathroom. it run under the stall door and i see it stand there. i see it has no fur, but what is crazy is that it has look like a penis. i scream and drop my warm tuna sandwhich on my lap and get in on my crotch and it look like i put tuna sandwich on my PENIS. the penis squirel run away and i see it saggy self run away out the bathroom.

i get out bathroom and leave my sandwhich on the floor. i miss my sandwich. when i run out to the court yard everyone see my crotch covered in tuna salad. they all point and laugh and call me tuna fucker. the head master of the school see this and get mad and call me to the main office. she is very mad and carries me to her office. everyone knows that i have a penis during the penis shortage and are always looking to capture me for my penis, but i do good and dont do bad stuff so i wont get my penis confiscated. amd stolen. but now i am in trouble.

when the headmaster lady takes me into her office she shov me in a chair, she throw me into it and she sit down at her desk and look at me. i say "miss headmaster dean lady, why am i in trouble for tuna salad?" and she leaned over in her chair and folded her hands together and say "you are in violation of rule number one thousand and thirty three of the collage hand book, no tuna salad on front of pants. because it looks like you fricked your tuna salad" she leaned back into her big swivel chair and put on a small pair of old lady glasses because she was old. she was 40 years old. she look at big book labled "school collage rules for professional itelectual people" and say "im sorry my dear boy david, but the punishment fro tuna salad fucking is expulsion from the school. but i can cut you a deal?"

I looks at the headmaster dean lady and i say "wait ummmmm what if it was potato salad instead of tuna salad?" i say and shrug my sholders. she say "well in that case i would have to end you myself" boss music starts to play and then she pulls out a large katana and a claymore from her bag and duel weilded them. she crossed them in a pose and david got scared. "wait wait! it was tuna salad i swear! what deal do you have for me?"

"ah yes i knew you would see reason" she says as she puts the comedically sized swords back into her comedically small hand bag. she sits back down into her chair and says "you see david, word has gotten around that you have a very large penis, more penis then you really need" she points to the now revealed outline of davids penis that is revealed from the tuna salad that has wet his pants. "i really need to change my pants" says david. "as you know we are still in a penis shortage, and our research department of the collage has been colaberating with a pharmasudical company called PENIS CORP. and penis corp needs individuals with large penises to join their trials to develop a way to stop the penis shortage. that way everyone can have the penises that they need!" the dean lady says with glee.

i was really confused on why the dean lady would need me for this problem. i need to keep going to my school classes so i can get my bacholers in light switch manufaturing! "but headmaster" david said, "if i go to work for penis corp what about my classes? my dream is to open a light switch factory so i can make a lot of light switches and make my family proud!" daivd sat up in his chair invigorated by his dream of his future. "what if they do evil experaments on me and my precious big penis!" david says in invigoration. he slamed his hand on the headmaster lady desk "i see what your doing here! you are trying to extort me for my penis for your own agenda".

the headmaster dean lady looked back at him and smiled, "perhaps david, perhaps not. maybe this is for the genuine good and well being for humanity. do you know how many people dont have enough penis to live in this world? how many people die from lack of penis? you could help fix the shortage and save the world!" she says folding her hands and laying them on her desk. "i understand your hesitation david, but think of the greater good" she cracks a smile and then says "and think of the fat stack of cash the school collage would get"

i was very disheartened at that last part. why does this lady want me to do this so bad? i know money is involved, but this is super suspicios. but seeing as this isnt a choice for me i have to take the deal. i have to think about it this way, i was blessed with a big penis and would never have to worry about running out. my familey has had people die of no penis in the worst of the shortage, my mom and dad died of the penis shortage! but to possibly give up my own was scary to me. but i knew what i had to do.... not like i have a choice at this point!

"ok miss school collage dean headmaster lady, i will take your deal. where are the super professional business contract papers i must sign?" david says, his head weighing in his hands. the school dean looks at him with a evil grin and says "you already signed them mr big penis" and then she holds a very long contract up showing his hand print signing it! "when you slammed you hand on my desk earlier you had signed it with your hand print!". david saw the the contract and saw his hand print signing it and ghasped! "you evil lady!" said david.

the dean lady pulled out a big fat cigar and lit it up and took and very, very, very long drag of it finishing it in one drag and blew the smoke into davids face as she says "its just business buddy" david coughs when he breaths in the smoke and when it clears he sees now there are a large group of people that have entered the room, but they were not normal people, but people with white lab coats and logos of penis corp on them. but the part that scared david was that they had heads that looked kinda familiar, like penises!

david had started to freak out, he tried to run but the chair he was sitting on had super glue on it! he couldnt get up. and as he struggled to get out of the chair he was blindfolded by the penis people and bound by rope to the chair. the last thing he saw the the penis people and the headmaster lady smiling whickedly at him. "you might hate me now david, but its for the better. your contribution to research will be to help the rest of the world. and make me really really rich! hahahaha" she say in a very evil way.

as david struggle he smell a really bad smell and then he passes out, and he is taken out of the room. the final thing he hears is the evil laugh of the teacher lady and the shuffling of the penis people taking him away.