Rent Boy | Hyunlix

Sense of belonging

"Felix, the client is waiting. Let's go."

A guard from the house appeared in the hallway, walking towards us. He roughly pulled Felix's hand away from mine and stood up.

"It was nice meeting you, sir," Felix said, bowing slightly before heading out to the car.

I sat there, my head buried in my hands. It felt maddening to be so confined, so young, and so limited in my new adult life. My hands were metaphorically shackled by my father and the expectations that came with my status.

I had always thought Felix was untouchable, as if my father had claimed him as his own. But it seemed Felix was also a commodity for other clients, which made me uneasy. I entered the salon again, where Margaret sat in her large, comfortable armchair, looking slightly inebriated with a martini in hand. The scene was revolting.

"Are you here for some fun, boy?" she asked with a grin, her eyes sparkling with mischief. Around her, some of the "angels" of the salon lounged, their behavior making me uncomfortable. They scrutinized me with hungry eyes, adding to my sense of unease.

"I'm looking for Felix," I said, my tone firm.

Margaret didn't need me to say his name. She seemed to anticipate my visit, her smirk suggesting she'd been expecting it.

"Oh, darling, he's quite busy today. I doubt he'll be able to accept your offer, no matter how gracious it might be."

"What do you mean?"

She laughed, a sound that mingled with the giggles of the other patrons, who seemed preoccupied with each other in a display of intimacy that felt unsettling.

"Felix has the exclusive right to accept or decline offers, and he's decided that last night was your final chance."

Margaret turned away, heading back into the lush garden area displayed in the salon. I was left feeling humiliated, like I was chasing after someone who had no interest in me. The situation was degrading, but I couldn't grasp what lay beneath Felix's seemingly aloof exterior.

I sank onto a nearby bench, the soft murmur of a small fountain offering a momentary distraction. The gentle sound of running water was a rare solace in my empty, troubled heart. I wanted to care for Felix, to save him from this life. Was that so wrong?

Glancing up, I noticed the dim light in Felix's room through a window. The light was on, and the window was slightly open. I decided that if Felix wasn't coming to me, I would go to him. I shrugged off my jacket and, using my athletic build to my advantage, climbed up to the window ledge. With a grunt of effort, I pushed the window open and slipped into the room.

Felix lay on the bed, seemingly relaxed after a client. He looked up with a mix of surprise and knowing amusement as I burst into his private space. He smiled slightly, perhaps having anticipated my intrusion. I tossed my jacket onto a nearby chair and approached him as he straightened up, his posture shifting from relaxation to alertness.

"Why did you come?"

Felix's voice was calm, but there was an undercurrent of curiosity. I moved closer to him, my mind racing with questions but unsure of how to articulate them.

"Why did you refuse?"

Felix's expression shifted slightly, and he closed the distance between us, his fingers gently caressing the side of my neck. The touch was warm and soothing, a stark contrast to the cold reality between us.

"You're living in a delusion, Hyunjin. We come from different worlds with different rules. I'm a prostitute, and you're a future leader with limitations imposed by your position. It's understandable and acceptable. Just let it go."