God Idol Project: Hope

It's not the end

There was a ringing in my ears.

"... Patient Jeong Hyeon-o has stomach cancer. It was discovered that it had spread to the heart, pancreas, and duodenum. He tried chemotherapy, but the effect was minimal. After that, he said he didn't want to stay in the hospital, so he only took medicine occasionally."

That's ridiculous. Are you lying?
I couldn't come to my senses at all while the doctor was talking. Before I knew it, I was the only one left in the hospital room. Even though he lost weight and his complexion got worse, I just thought it was because he worked too hard. Why didn't I notice it? My brother's strange behaviors were put together like a puzzle. We first met in front of the hospital.
The story of studying abroad that he brought up like a shield from the moment we first met.

An offer to become music friends for a limited time. I remember you suddenly sending me home saying you had an urgent appointment.
As a former idol, he never forgets to put on makeup even when he's resting. The sight of him sneaking out to the bathroom right after eating. We couldn't meet for a few days because we were busy. My brother's overly ambitious actions to leave a record of the song... .
Why didn't you think it was strange? Why didn't you notice it sooner when the clues were right in front of you!

"... Lee Won-ah."
My brother's weak voice sounded engraved in my ears.
"brother!"

All sorts of emotions came rushing in. My vision became blurry because of the tears. I couldn't even see my brother's face because the tears were pouring down. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't handle this situation.

"Lee Won-ah. Sorry... I didn't want you to know, but it looks like you found out."

My brother, who had taken off his oxygen mask, raised his upper body with difficulty and gave an awkward smile while lying down halfway.

"Why didn't you tell me? Why!"
Because I'm not useful? What could I do if I found out, when I can't even be my brother's guardian?

"... I did that because I thought you might get hurt. If I pretended to lose contact with you under the pretense of studying abroad, you could have hoped that i would be doing well somewhere. But I collapsed too soon. If I had known this would happen, I wouldn't have been friends with you. I'm sorry. I was selfish."
"Why do you always think about others?"

My voice became more horrible than usual. My brother's help was useless.

"Just. Just like this. This is who I am. I don't want to hurt anyone until I leave. I don't want anyone to know that I'm gone. That's why I didn't even tell our members. Two weeks is not enough, so this is a perfect crime."

My brother made a meticulous plan to block all paths by which his death could be known. He said he had 6 to 9 months left to live. So after 6 months, he planned to pack everything up and pretend to go overseas while being admitted to a hospice ward. After death, they even prepared a place to be buried. Every now and then, my brother would catch his breath. Suddenly, my heart sank.

"If i send letters regularly on the scheduled dates, it will be perfect."

My throat tightened as I watched my brother casually mention the aftermath of his death.
How could you be like that? Why are you so calm? How could you endure death all alone?
You can vent to someone, cry out loud together, and be seen off by people you miss.

"It's scary... ."
"Don't be scared. You wrote those lyrics. Don't be afraid of new beginnings. Even that was arranged for me."

The lyrics were meant to bless my brother's new beginning... .

"I hate myself for not noticing."
"I tried so hard to hide it. I lied to everyone except you. I'm a professional liar."
"What if my brother's friends find out later?"