Violet Crazy

Chapter III: Tourments aux Cerises

"You have a shift to do, Xavier. You're supposed to see Daniel tonight. Don't let that kiss be a waste."

Xavier's breath came in ragged gasps as he rushed down the hallway of the hospital, each step feeling like he was dragging a heavy weight. Eli's voice sliced through his thoughts, but he forced himself to focus on his mother. Every sacrifice he made after his father died, every dream he postponed, was for her. Leaving his dreams of becoming a singer in favor of a more consistent paycheck. It was a sacrifice he needed to make as her son, even if it cost him everything he wanted.

Eli's voice was like blades against his skin. Xavier tried his best to push it out, to toughen himself, but Eli's words were too sharp.

"Dumbass! What has she done for you? Even while your father was alive, she valued herself over you! Your brother, who was only four years older than you, had to take care of you by himself," Eli spat.

Xavier's fists clenched as he tried to push Eli's voice out of his mind, but the pain was relentless. "She still loved us, and you know that!" Xavier shot back.

Eli's hand gripped Xavier's shoulder, forcing him to a halt. "Do we? Then why were they fighting almost every night? Why did your dad take up a job in that shady company? She wasn't doing jackshit. That's why he's dead!"

Xavier leaned against the wall, sweat dripping down as he pounded it in frustration. "You weren't even there until after it happened!"

"Yeah, and that's why you let her push you around as much as she did. Whether you trust me or not, I'm the one who can give you the life you've always wanted," Eli said, his words wrapping around Xavier's throat.

When Xavier didn't answer him, Eli scowled and dug his fingers into Xavier's head. Xavier struggled to breathe as Eli's fingers clamped down on his skull. "You didn't have to be tied to this 'obligation' of yours if you weren't so soft," Eli derided. "She's ruining her own life, it wouldn't be your fault if she died."

Screaming in agony, Xavier grabbed Eli's hand and wrenched it away. He looked up, bloodshot, and stared back at the cold eyes looking down at him. He fought to steady his voice despite his throat closing up. "You're just in my head. I can shut you up."

"Then why don't you? Go on, shut me up." Eli said, spreading his arms wide. Xavier wanted to fight, but Eli's presence seemed to paralyze him.

"You're considering everything I'm saying, aren't you?" Eli continued. "You brush me off, but you keep listening to me. You know deep down that I'm right. You're just too weak to actually do it."

Xavier tried to fight back, but Eli seemed to be pushing every other thought he had. His voice was overwhelmingly loud, muffling everything else, and Xavier's vision was blurring. He could sense nurses asking him if he was alright, but he couldn't turn to reply to them. Eli was holding him down, and he couldn't break free no matter how hard he tried.

"Look at you," Eli sneered. "Your life is a fucking mess. You should've gone through with it all those years ago, like you told me . If Nathan wasn't so selfish, you would've been free. You told me just how much you wanted to do it, but in the end you faltered. You always do."

"Yeah, you're right," Xavier said weakly. Eli was winning against him, and Xavier felt like all he could do was surrender. His legs gave out under him and he collapsed to the floor in defeat. A group of nurses rushed over to him, but he was too helpless to do anything.

Eli's tone softened, almost sympathetic. "Pull yourself together, Xavier. No one can give you what you want other than yourself. It's okay to be selfish sometimes."

Xavier didn't respond. The nurses helped him up, but his limbs felt like jelly. His breathing was weak, and his pulse wasn't showing any signs of slowing down. The world around Xavier blurred as he was wheeled away. His eyes fluttered closed, and he fell into a troubled, dreamless sleep.