"Josette Olivia Saltzman! Are you drinking again?" Lizzie screams at her sister as soon as she closes the front door.
"No, I'm baking cookies, what does it look like?" Josie sighs as she takes another drink.
"Don't be a smart ass. I'm just concerned. I've never seen you like this before."
Lizzie puts down her bag and sits next to her sister on the couch.
Lizzie is at a loss. For the last month, Josie has been staying at their mom's house and has been drunk more than sober. Lizzie has tried to be understanding and give her time, but now she's falling behind in all her classes and is on the verge of getting kicked out.
"Talk to me please." Lizzie pleads with her twin.
After about 5 minutes and another empty bottle later Josie turns to her sister. "Lizzie, I don't know what to do. I can't sleep. When I do sleep I keep having nightmares. I can't focus enough to worry about school right now. And on top of all that, I just feel guilty. I just want all of this to be over." The brunette is crying at this point.
Lizzie places a hand on Josie's shoulder. "Listen, I know it's been a shit month and I know you miss him, I do too, but you can't stop living your life because Dad is gone. He wouldn't want that for any of us."
Josie looks up at her sister and starts crying harder placing her head in her hands. She starts speaking but Lizzie can't understand a word through the loud sobbing. Lizzie rubs her back until her crying subsides. "I feel guilty Lizzie, you don't understand. Never mind."
"Jo, please tell me what's going on. I'm having a hard time following you."
"I slept with Hope! And now she's avoiding me, and god, I called her drunk and practically begged her to have phone sex with me. What the fuck is wrong with me? Who does that? Did she only do all those things because she felt bad for me? I practically threw myself at her after the funeral. I should have been grieving, not having sex. I'm such an idiot!" Josie rushes out in a single breath.
Lizzie is silent, so Josie continues. "Our father died Lizzie, and all I'm worried about is Hope and bullshit that shouldn't matter right now. What kind of person does that make me?"
Lizzie takes her time before she answers. "Jo, Dad loved you, and he wouldn't want you to beat yourself up over this. If he was still here, he would tell you to get your head out of your ass and go get the girl." Lizzie chuckles sadly thinking about their dad.
"Lizzie if Dad hadn't died, I probably would have never seen Hope again. She all but disappeared two years ago. If she hadn't come back, I wouldn't have made a complete fool out of myself. She would be happy and probably wouldn't think twice about me." Josie leans her head on the blonde's shoulder.
"Josette, my dear sweet sister, and I say this with all the love in my heart, you're a dumbass."
Josie looks up to Lizzie shock on her face, "What the actual fuck Lizzie? Is that supposed to be helpful?"
Lizzie sighs exasperatingly, "Do you remember when Hope moved away? Do you remember why she moved away?"
Josie looks confused but nods in conformation. "She wanted to move to be at a better school and she had just broken things off with Landon. She said she couldn't be here anymore."
"Uh huh, and what else do you know about it?" Lizzie asks almost nonchalantly.
"She told me the night of the funeral that she left because she couldn't stand to see me with Penelope, she said it hurt too much. I mean I was pretty drunk but I know she never particularly liked her, I just never understood why. They were always civil but they were never friends per se. How is all this supposed to help me?"
"Just think about it, Hope said she couldn't stand to see you with Penelope." Josie nods so Lizzie continues. "And she slept with you after she found out you two broke up," Josie keeps hangin on her every word nodding along. "And she said it hurt her to see you two together." Josie looks lost. "Jesus Christ, do you need me to draw you a chart or a diagram or something?" Lizzie asks raising her voice.
Josie just stares at her until finally a lightbulb, no, a giant spotlight seems to beam above her head. With wide eyes she jumps up from the couch like it's on fire and starts pacing the living room.
"Why the hell didn't you tell me Lizzie?" She yells while she continues pacing running a hand through her hair. "Why am i such a clueless dumbass? Oh my god. I have to stop drinking. or drink more, I don't know." Josie starts to slow her pace and looks toward her sister. "How long have you known?"
"About her feelings or yours?" Lizzie asks pointedly.
"About hers, and what do you mean about mine? I don't...I haven't...I can't...wait, you knew I had feelings for her and you didn't tell me?" Josie is pacing again.
"Jo, you can't tell me you didn't know you've been in love each other since we were kids. It's so obvious. Why do you think her and the Hobbit broke up?"
"He cheated on her Lizzie."
"He told MG that he cheated because Hope was in love with you. He said he felt like he was constantly her second choice. That in no way excuses what he did but I'm just telling you what he said."
Josie is lost in thought as she continues to pace.
"AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDN'T KNOW THAT I WAS IN LOVE WITH HOPE?" Josie shouts looking at the ceiling.
"Yes honey, we all knew." Caroline says as she walks in the front door groceries in hand. "She loves you too." She adds as she walks into the kitchen leaving the twins alone again.
"Thanks Mom!" Josie shouts at the kitchen door that is now closed.
"To be fair, Hope doesn't know you're in love with her either. Y'all are perfect for each other. Two clueless, useless gays. I guess it works out." Lizzie deadpans.
"Very helpful Lizzie."
"Look I'm just trying to help here. Don't shoot the messenger." Lizzie says as she raises her hands in defense.
"Well, what do I do now?"
"Maybe you should sober up a little more before you decide on a plan of action."
"Good point."
"Just don't wait too long, god knows you deserve to be happy." Lizzie says as she gets up to hug her sister.
Josie hugs her back and walks toward the stairs. She turns around at the base of the stairs and smiles at Lizzie. "Thank you, I don't know what I'd do without you.... Also, I am not a useless gay."
"Whatever you say sister."
