Pangaia: Agendas (Year One: Fall)

Chapter Fourteen - Zes

Zes grew up knowing about magic. He'd been comfortable with the concept of its existence his entire life.

And yet, for the first time in his life he felt magical. Not in the sense that he had untapped power to do amazing and otherwise unexplainable things, but in the way that everything about the world felt...different. Special.

All because of Cheyenne.

I just met her. I need to not get too carried away.

If anything scared a potential love interest away, it was coming on too strong, too fast. If anyone was great at doing both of those things, it was Zes.

It's not like he wanted to be overwhelming on purpose. He did try to get his emotions under control. Zes wore certain feelings openly and honestly. Good feelings in particular he struggled with keeping to himself. If he was floating on a cloud of happiness, everyone saw it.

Even Anj.

"I take it you had a great time," his twin said.

"How could I not when I got a whole plate of mushrooms to myself!" Zes replied, keeping his answer safe.

Cheyenne likes mushrooms too. He liked having that in common with her. Too many people hated mushrooms and it frustrated him to no end. They were delicious! We won't have a hard time ordering pizza.

"I noticed," Anj said. "I didn't get any."

"Maybe if you spent less time dancing, you'd have more time to eat."

"But then I would miss out on dancing time."

Zes rolled his eyes, then frowned. He danced at least two songs with Cheyenne. Why? "I think you've made Jewl jealous enough. Don't you?"

"Are you suggesting I work on mending our relationship?"

"I'm just saying maybe you should stop torturing her." And using an innocent bystander in the process.

In truth, he was more worried about what Jewl might do to Cheyenne if things got out of hand. For now, Jewl was sticking to dirty looks—like it was Cheyenne's fault—and it annoyed Zes to no end. He'd say something to Jewl about needing her to stop, but he was just as afraid of Jewl as everyone else. She'd probably yell at him about Anj, and he hated being in the middle of his brother's fights with his ex.

Anj rested his head on his hand. "There's no fun in that."

"You'll show her that you don't need her if you act like her existence doesn't bother you," Zes added. "By tormenting her on purpose, you're still caring. Besides, it's not being nice to Chey."

"Ah, yes, that's what you're most concerned about."

Zes knew the statement would make his intentions transparent. Unfortunately, Anj could be thick. If Zes was good at keeping his negative feelings close to his chest, Anj was great at doing that with all his emotions, so figuring out how much Anj understood was always a not fun guessing game.

For being twins and knowing his brother better than anyone, he also didn't know a lot at the same time. In that regard, he related to Jewl's frustrations all too well.

"Are you sure she knows that you're not interested in her?" Zes added. "Because sometimes I wonder."

He'd seen the way Cheyenne gazed at Anj. Perhaps she didn't hide it because Anj couldn't see her large, dopey eyes. Perhaps when she thought of Zes she had the same look and kept it secret.

Perhaps, but Anj was so much more attractive because of his confidence. And the aloofness. And the wit. And everything else that I'm not.

Anj shrugged. "I thought I made it clear. A lot changes quickly around here. Maybe I am interested. A little."

"O-oh?"

"There's a lot to like." Anj's deadpan made it hard to tell if he was serious or baiting his brother. Eventually, he let out a sigh, and Zes got his answer. Serious.

Zes swallowed. "But she's not Jewl? Is that the problem?"

"She's the opposite of everything Jewl is," Anj said. "Which might be what I need, but I also might only be telling myself that because I need to know if I should keep putting all of my eggs in one basket. If I'm going to branch away from what I'm comfortable with, the new girl is the route to go."

"M-makes sense."

What else was Zes supposed to say? "Nope, you can't chase her. I'm calling dibs!" Cheyenne was a person, not a donut.

"But she's not Jewl," Anj whispered.

"If you still love her so much, fix things." How many times had Zes already told him that? Too many to count.

Anj hugged his knees to his chest. "I've got a tough decision to make first. That's what I'm waiting for. It's so complicated."

"How so?"

"I—"

"Can't tell me." Zes waved a hand in front of his face and turned away. "Got it."

"You're quick to assume."

"Am I wrong?"

There was a long pause. "No."

"Okay." Zes was used to it, that's how he knew exactly what his brother was going to say. "I can't tell you" were four words he heard just about every day.

There was another long moment of silence.

Anj sighed. "Did you use the elevator today?"

"Why do you keep thinking I'm going to?" Zes asked. He had to keep the annoyance out of his voice. To do so he rolled his eyes, gazed up at the heavens and ground his teeth together—all while keeping his breathing even.

"It's a simple question. I told you it was a good idea to stay out of it."

"I know." He remembered the conversation from the morning.

Anj stood from the couch. "I think it's time for bed."

"Yeah," Zes agreed.

They went to their separate rooms.