You Take My Cares Away

Chapter 3 - Facing The Silence of Buried Emotions

(Ariana's Pov)

March-27th-2018

Studio, Los Angeles 📍

Courtney: "You sure you're, okay? Ari, you look pretty tired." She asks me very concerned.

I forced a smile, trying to sound so shaky in my voice as I talked.

Ariana: "It's just the jet lag; you know how it gets me after a long flight." I tried to sound nonchalant, but the dark circles under my eyes and slump in my shoulders gave away to my stupid wearines. "Seriously, I'll be fine; I just need to shake it off and get to work."

Courtney: "No, you look pretty tired to me; before you left for DC, you were fine."

Victoria looked up from her keyboard, a knowing glance passing between us.

Victoria: "Hey, how was the show at DC? I heard that Miley was there. Did you guys catch up while you were there?"

I think she knew what she was doing, trying to steer our conversation away from the tension in the room. I was too tired to notice and just answered her questions.

Ariana: "It was good; it felt amazing to see how many people there were out there spreading awareness, and, um, yeah, I'm glad I went really." I gave her a soft smile. "Right, Miley, yeah, we talked for a bit. She's doing good; I should've seen her sing; she sounded so beautiful. I love her so much."

The mention of Miley brought a moment of relief to the tension in the room, but it felt more like a band-aid on a deep wound. They both exchanged glances; they were aware something else was weighing down my thoughts. But we all let that go, and for now, focusing on the music.

Courtney: "Sounded like you had a good time in DC. Anything else you'd like to share?"

Ariana: "I don't think so; I was just hella busy over there. But the flight back was definitely a fucking nightmare; I couldn't sleep at all." I chuckled, holding back a mouth from yawning.

Victoria: "You know what? Maybe you should just rest for today, and we can pick this up tomorrow. The vibe isn't quite right here today anyway, and the melody we're working on isn't clicking for me either. You're not the only one who's off their game, it seems." She nodded at Courtney, who was nodding in agreement.

I looked at them both confused as fuck. Maybe it was the lack of sleep or the fact that we haven't spent 2 hours in the studio at all today. Yeah, I was tired and not on my "A" game, but music is everything to me, just like... Faith.

Ariana: "What? I'm fine; it's just a rough start we had; nothing a bit more working can't fix. I swear, look, let me record some more vocals, and we can go from there."

I got up and walked over to the recording booth and reached for the headset. I wanted to show them that I was fine and ready to work; none of that I'm worried about shit.

Courtney and Victoria shared another knowing look before Victoria sighed and opened the program on the computer. She started playing the beat for my next track, no tears left to cry.

As I began to sing, my voice cracked on the first few notes. It was the first time I had ever had trouble hitting my range so early in a session. The lyrics we'd written down were about moving on from past events, showing courage in the face of adversity in what I went through last year, but I felt like a mockery in my current state.

Courtney then stopped the track and looked at me with concern.

Courtney: "Ari, maybe you should sit down."

I took a deep breath, trying to regain my composure.

Ariana: "I'm okay, really. Let's just try it again."