Safe Place

Chapter 1

I always dreaded coming home from school because of my parents. I felt no matter what I did, they weren't proud the way you'd expect a parent to be. Constantly I felt I was messing up, and anything I went to go do I had the fear of my mother calling me upset.

 I always check my phone every few minutes in case I miss a call or text, just to be sure I wouldn't get in trouble later for it and "lose trust" with my mother. It caused enormous amounts of anxiety for me. 

However, even if I didn't want to go home, I did enjoy the 40 minute bus ride to and from school. 

Sure, the smells weren't great and some of the people were odd, but it meant I got to read my book and listen to music full blast without a worry in the world.

As I listened to my music, it was rudely interrupted by a text. 

Olivia: hey when you come home i have a question for you, nothing crazy, just wanna see if you're up to do something with me and Joseph 

These kinds of messages always annoyed me.

Me: just tell me now?

Olivia: nooo i'll tell you at the house dw it's fun

I rolled my eyes and didn't respond.

Once I got home I listened to my mom question me about grades for the millionth time. "Are you even going to graduate?? All you do is sleep and stare at your phone! You're lazy and I am sick of it." Sighing, I take out my computer and show her my 'updated' grades that were really just from me hitting inspect and changing the numbers. "Is this good enough? I am trying, but I'm exhausted okay? This school is way harder than I expected." My mother shakes her head, "Whatever. I am going to start dinner.", then walks off into the kitchen as I put the computer away. 

I shared a room with my step-sister Olivia, so when I walked in she was of course already in there and on the phone with her boyfriend Joseph. 

For some reason I couldn't stand the way she laughed at things he'd say. Some nights I'd be up all night listening to them talk, and her giggling as I cringe. Maybe we were around each other too much. I wish I had my own room.

"Hey, what'd you want to ask me?" I question.

She sits up, "Do you want to go hang out with me, Joseph, and some friends?"

I shrug. "I mean I guess? Are you sure?"

She looks at me confused. "Yeah, I mean, why not??"

I shrug again, "I don't know. My mom is just kind of annoyed with me at the moment, but I can ask?" I felt a bit excited because I would've spent another night on my phone or watching tv if she hadn't asked.

I go and ask my mom, and of course she lectured me a bit, but she eventually let me go. 

"Make sure your location and phone notifications are on." 

I nod and start walking back to my room, "They always are."

Later that night

I was getting ready with Olivia to go hang out with Joseph, Vante, and others. 

Social gatherings made me nervous, but I think it's because of quarantine and not being around people for so long. I kept overthinking what to wear or how to do my hair.