Saudade | CountryHumans RusAme

CHAPTER 20: Trigger Finger High

RUSSIA
America's distress reminded him of how Ukraine used to act to him long ago, when they were still fighting.

Again and again he would open his mouth to say something but take it back, gaze never leaving the UN worker shrunk into a corner before him. The gun had slid across the floor, in arm's reach, but he still wouldn't pick it up, even when the enemy was armed and he was not. Just like a prisoner who had escaped from a ward, it didn't seem like he was talking to anyone else ⎯ just himself, rather. For anyone, even someone who was more of an ex-rival than a friend, this was an unsettling sight.

"America," Canada kept trying, but his brother wouldn't give any reply. Germany and Poland, huddled into their own corner, were also initially getting ignored ⎯ before they both gave up, too shock-stricken to say anything else.

Russia, eventually, not being able to handle seeing what was seemingly a descent into insanity, marched forward and pulled America back by the torso, nearly tripping over the dust covering the floor in a sleek layer. It seemed to bring him back to his senses.

He quickly broke the contact before America would lose it even more, and the air suddenly felt very cold. There was a lingering smell of coconut. Did he wash his hair with coconut shampoo? No, that wasn't the problem here.

Canada immediately grabbed his hand and dragged his emotion-struck sibling away, whispering quietly to him about what had happened. With a glance from everyone else, the remainder of the group followed and quickly abandoned the premises, leaving the UN worker behind.

"What do you think happened?" Ukraine asked once they were far enough away, face full of concern. "Oh Russia, I've never seen America act like that. That was scary."

"I haven't either," South muttered from the side. "Germany, Poland, you guys were here before us, what was going on?"

"I can't be for sure," Poland pursed his lips. "All he did that was major was hold a gun. And something was preventing him from shooting."

"But it was just his conscience, right?" North asked, not looking very swayed.

"That's what I think," Poland sighed. "But from his reaction, don't you think there's something more to it?"

The conversation subsided, and remained like so until Canada finally joined the group and from the look he gave them, didn't seem to know anything more either. He wiped a few stains of blood off his hands on a tissue he drew out from his pocket.

"Does anyone need them? If we're gonna get on public transport, we shouldn't look roughed up like this." He patted Poland's hair down after passing a tissue each to North and Japan.

"Ame, let's go," he said with a tilt of his head. "Are you alright?"

America nodded. "Yeah. Maybe I overexaggerated," he began to say, but his voice began to rapidly lose its confidence after, like he was taking his words back.

"Just don't think about it," Russia offered, and America looked up at him, eyes still a little glassy. He nodded once more.

★

Even Chipotle couldn't bring America back to his normal bubbly state, it seemed, because they door-dashed it that night with a side of drinks and he had his lips zipped the whole time.

Recovery was quick with food around. North got his fists bandaged by China, Japan was completely okay after a single shower, Poland seemed to be alright listening to Germany complain about the amount of classics they hadn't seen living in Neo, and he was also feeling better with some steaming hot dinner in his mouth. The others hadn't really been harmed.