Before I Knew You

Part 3

Kendall shook his head but followed James. The conversation was hushed and heated and Kendall came back over, "I just wanted to tell you to let HD know we took care of you." and he turned to James, "I don't like this."

James patted him on the shoulder, "I know bro, but it has to be done."

I looked at them puzzled, What the hell... but I was too engrossed with the fact that I was seeing Big Time Rush and backstage that everything else just disappeared from my brain.

I was leaving after the concert and the guys caught up with me, "Hey (yn)..." James said, "We really hope you enjoyed the concert."

I laughed, "I had the 'time of my life'." and they all laughed. I looked around, "Where is Kendall?"

Carlos spoke up, "He wanted me to apologize for him. He had something very important to take care of."

Logan kissed me on the cheek, "The best of luck." and they disappeared.

I stood there, disappointment washing over me, Kendall has always been my favorite. I really wish I had gotten to say goodbye to him. Then I realized I was on my way to see HD and that made things a little better, not a lot but a little.

I was almost at my spot when I heard someone whistling. I had to laugh, "HD?"

He laughed, "Yeah. Didn't want you tripping over me again. How was the concert?"

I walked over until I felt like I was close to him and sat down, "It was AMAZING!! You are my hero!"

He chuckled as he moved closer to me, "Na. Not a hero. Maybe a knight in shining armor." He got serious, "The guys said you're an amazing girl but you're not taking care of yourself..."

I reached for him, "I'm sorry. I couldn't eat. There was way too much going on..."

He interjected, "But you have no choice now. There isn't just you to think about. You have the baby..."

I hesitated, "I keep trying not to think about that." and sadness washed over me.

He linked his arm in mine, "You can't do that. I know it's tough, but do you have any idea what you are going to do?"

I paused, looking out into the black abyss and the tears started, "Why did you have to do that?"

"Do what?"

I took a deep breath, "I had the most amazing night of my life and was so proud of myself for what I did last night and now you have to ask me about this. I don't have this part of my life figured out yet so why do I have to deal with it right now?" I asked between sobs.

He put his arm around me and pulled me into a hug, "I'm so sorry. I'm just worried about you. I just want to make sure you're okay before..."

I pulled away from him and I could tell from his tone of voice it was not going to be something I wanted to hear, "Before what?"

He quietly told me, "Before I have to leave."

The hysterical crying began, and I couldn't speak. He was holding me tight, and I was fighting, trying to get away from him, "Where are you going? Why do you have to leave? I thought you liked me. I thought we were friends. You're running away from me just like everybody else. What is it? TELL ME!" I shouted.

He stammered, "Its...I have...Its work. It's not you. I...Don't...We..."

I screamed at him, "Just spit it out! I have had enough of you stupid ass men to last me a lifetime. Lure me into a false sense of safety and then ditch me when you have me on top of the world, so I have further to fall! That is really a sick and twisted thing to do, and I don't understand why people keep doing it to me!!!" I broke free and headed for the hotel room.