One heart crying

With him till I die

I love way too much,
he will never know.
Will forever remember his promises
"We will be dancing in the snow".
How he said we will be happy
forever and ever.
Now Im crying in no ones arms
with a slight fever.
I want to tear my skin off
to be his type.
Be the most beautiful girl in the world,
that he would defend in a fight.
Live closer to him,
so that he doesn't complain
about how he hates the distance
like he had to travel by a plane.
I want to have a different life,
make better decisions as a kid.
Pick the same interests
and keep my interest rest under a lid.
If only I picked differently
or just moved by little steps.
So that it wasn't such a shock,
but in my delusions we will have 3 cats.
Well not now,
he fell out of love.
If only love wasn't so complicated,
but was brought by a beautiful dove.
I want to restart life
or just end it all.
So that I'm just the right for him,
all that it takes is a little fall.
I really fell in love
specifically "love at first sign".
I fell in love even with the birth marks
and with the snoring I was just fine.
I will remember forever.
I will never forget.
I will wait for you forever
I will stop only when I'm dead.
I hope I die soon.
That my skin will turn red
with all the blood coming out of my back
that will never heal from this terrible stab.