Attorney of Noir

Chapter 1: It Was Raining Outside

"It was raining outside. The sun's light was completely lost behind the clouds, and so none of its rays fell into the stern detective's office. However, he still sat as if it were perfect weather outside, leaning back in his chair and throwing his feet up on the table. His good old beige trench coat and signature fedora hung on the counter nearby. If it weren't for the semi-darkness, as the light barely reached the room, his white shirt would look good. Taking a cheap cigar out of his mouth, he drops the ash onto the newspaper he is holding."

–Wait a second... do cigarettes even leave ash? – I ask.

–How should I know?! Why are you writing about this if you don't even know it? – my assistant answers the question with a question, displeasure in her voice.

–Because noir detectives always smoke regular cigarettes. You say as if you don't know it.

–I do, in fact, not know it. Out of us two, you are the one who is obsessed with your image, I, on the other hand, don't read such tabloid literature! I would say again "you're a lawyer, not a detective", but the last 40 times haven't convinced you...

–Now do you understand why my novels depict you as "Watson" and not as an assistant equal to the detective? Well, of course, it's based on the real events, in which I solved almost everything myself... but still.

–You know what? Fine, I'll say it again. You're not a detective, you're a lawyer. But since that's not enough for you, and since you asked for my opinion... well, fine, great detective, I'll help you with your C grade introduction. Your trench coat is dirty. It was sunny that day. You have a laptop on your desk, you wouldn't risk putting your legs up on it. You had the lights on that day and there was no semi-darkness. So, if you claim that this is "based on the real events", rewrite everything you just wrote.

Her words cut to the heart. As much as I'd like to refute these... attacks, she is absolutely right in all her remarks. However, my novels are still only "based" on real events... Moreover, this is only an introduction, and not the main part of the story. Okay, I suppose the ash falls from the cigarettes, because there is a reason for ashtrays... getting up from the table, I open the window and, taking the electronic cigarette in my mouth, blow a cloud of vapor out the window. Seems like I can't write at all today... Despite I won that case 3 months ago, I can't even finish the introduction. However, my sad thoughts, just like the vapor, are dispersed by a sudden ringing of the doorbell. I quickly sit down at the table and assume a pose as if I'm deep in thought.

–Lisa, open the door, – I say.

Standing up from her chair and putting her phone in her pocket, my assistant goes to the front door of my office and opens it. Like a gust of wind, an unfamiliar girl rushes into the room and, as if instinctively, sits down on the chair in front of my desk. I slowly close my laptop, giving my guest the impression of a serious man... which I am.

–Judging by how quickly you sat down where my clients should be, you know where you came to... and you are undoubtedly in trouble, – I said.

–Oh, you are right! Mr. Setson, you are just like in your own books...–- she began happily, but added in a slightly disappointed voice, – but still, I imagined you... older.

–Of course. It would be strange if the "tough detective" was only 25 years old, wouldn't it? So I added a few years to my count.

I hear Elizabeth sigh as she closes the front door. She comes to my desk and starts sorting through the documents. She's looking for the necessary form to fill out for the client... after all, as she said, I am a lawyer.

–I wonder... can you tell me something else, judging by my appearance alone, Mr. Setson? – her eyes are literally glowing... how can I refuse such a fan?