(ENJOY!)
ONCE UPON A TIME, ON A LOVELY EVENING, WITH EVERY NEW DAY, ANEW BEGINNING, COMES ANEW DAWN OF FUN, A HOPE THAT THINGS WILL BE BETTER TODAY, THAN THEY WERE FOR IT FOR YESTERDAY, BUT, SADLY, NOT FOR ME, MY NAME IS CAP.JARGONOT NORTH, AND, THIS IS MY CAVEMAN-FAMILY, THE NORTHS, TOO. IF YOU WEREN'T ALREADY CLUED IN ALREADY BY THE ANIMAL SKINS THAT WE WEAR AS CLOTHES OVER US, AND, SLOPING HEADS, WE'RE CAVEMEN AND CAVEWOMEN, TOO. MOST DAYS LIKE TODAY, WE SPEND OUR CAVES IN THE DARK! NIGHT, AFTER NIGHT, DAY AFTER DAY, YEP, HOME, SWEET HOME! BUT, FROM SADLY TO GLADLY, WHEN WE DID GO OUT, WE STRUGGLED TO FIND FOOD IN A HARSH AND HOSTILE WORLD, AND, I STRUGGLED TO SURVIVE AWAY FROM MY FAMILY, WE WERE THE LAST ONES AROUND, UM, THERE USED TO BE NEIGHBORS! THE GORGS-SMASHED DOWN BY A GIANT MAMMOTH'S FOOT! THE HORCKS-WHO WERE SWALLOWED DOWN BY A GIANT SAND-SNAKE! THE ERFEES-STABBED DOWN BY MOSQUITO-BITES-ILLNESS, AND, THE THROGES-SICK FROM A COMMON COLD! AND, THE NORTHS, THAT'S US, THE SOUTHS AND CAINES AND NORTHS MADE IT OUT BECAUSE OF MY MOM AND MY DAD! HE WAS STRONG AND HE ALWAYS FOLLOWED THE RULES! THE ONES PAINTED ON THE CAVE WALLS! ANYTHING NEW WAS BAD! CURIOSITY WAS BAD! GOING OUT AT NIGHT IS BAD! BASICALLY ANYTHING FUN WAS BAD! WELCOME TO MY WORLD! BUT, SADLY, THIS IS A STORY ABOUT HOW THAT ALL CHANGED IN AN INSTANT! BECAUSE ON WHAT WE DIDN'T KNOW, IT WAS THAT OUR WORLD WAS ABOUT TO COME TO AN END! OR SO WE THOUGHT THAT IT WAS AN END FOR US, AND, THERE WERE NO RULES ON OUR CAVE WALLS TO PREPARE US FOR THAT MESS!...
(TO BE CONTINUED!...)
GAME OVER. THE END.
