I don't mean no trouble
Every day is a struggle
Buried under all this rubble
Using addiction to hide
It puts you in a bind
You can't numb your mind
No everything's not fine
I'm struggling
Struggling to fight
Fight those voices inside
Those voices inside my mind
I wished they'd bore
I can't take this no more
It's been years
Years of trying to drown em with beers.
But all the booze
And they still won't hit snooze
I'm trying to stay brave
Digging myself an early grave
All the clawing and pounding
It's got me doubting
Doubting my ability to fight
To fight those voices in my mind
I'm seeing red
Just laying in my bed
Wishing I was dead
The voices inside
Are eating me alive
Left with all this doubt
Im appearing spaced out
Don't make the wrong observation
I'm deep in conversation
Trying to reason
Reason with those voices
Those voices in my mind
For the longest time I couldn't feel
Feel anything but anger & hurt
Throwing everything in the dirt
Trying to cause physical pain
But there was no gain
No one can see
I'm stuck in a hole
No longer do I see the goal
Feeling as black as coal
Please just take my soul
Looking into his eyes I see
I see the same hurt
The hurt from a lifetime
A lifetime of trying
Trying to escape the voices
The voices in our mind
The trauma from the past
Well it's just a fucking blast
They say it won't last
But just going through
Going through the shit we went through
It teaches you to hide
Hide those voices in your mind
I don't mean no trouble
Every day is a struggle
Buried under all this rubble
Using addiction to hide
It puts you in a bind
You can't numb your mind
No everything's not fine
So don't go assuming
These voices are all consuming
Feeling the touch of the devil
Brings it to a new level
I don't want this sin
So I can't let them win
Its my love
My love for you
That gives me an ounce of strength
Strength to fight
Fight those voices in my mind
I'll try and bury the daily struggle
Under the rubble
Because it's the thought of you
That has any hope of getting me through.
I tell myself it stupid
I tell myself to wake up
But I can't keep pushing on
I can't keep pushing my luck
But I just dont give a fuck
Not a single one, no not no more
I don't know why I still bother
But I'm trying to keep it together
Trying to stay strong
Trying to keep my faith
But everyday a struggle
Trapped under this rubble
Wrapped in shackles and chains
I'm a prisoner in my own brain
YOU ARE READING
Behind the Smile
PoesíaWriting helps me clear my mind and make some sense of how I'm feeling. so here is a collection of some short pieces I have written latley. Please note this how they were written at the time without editing and not necessarily how I am feeling now. I...
