Lightning Strikes

The New Neighbors (#resident)

Betsy and Guy William were over the moon to be hosting their new neighbors for dinner. Betsy brought a towering plate of chicken breasts in from the kitchen.

"It's important to get enough protein," she cooed, "so I went overboard."

Guy looked at his wife appreciatively, she would do anything to keep them both healthy. And she looked good for fifty. 

"Can you believe, Betsy turned 50 this year," he boasted to Amy and Michael who had just moved in next door a week ago. "She is really into fitness. She could pass as being in her 30's."

"Oh, stop, Guy," said Betsy with a blush. Amy and Michael looked uncomfortably from Guy to Betsy and then back at each other, but didn't reply.

"I'm not going to be bashful about singing your praises," said Guy, continuing. "She keeps me up on all of the latest healthiest ways to eat. We've done paleo, keto, South Beach, Mediterranean, DASH..."

"But we have settled on intermittent fasting," continued Betsy. "This is the first time we have eaten all day." She smiled at Guy. "We are confident you two will love it too!"

Amy and Michael's eyes grew large but they remained quiet.

"Wine is healthy," said Guy, changing the topic. He lifted the bottle that sat at the table.

"In moderation of course," said Betsy. "I don't think you gave Michael enough though, why don't you top him off." 

Without waiting for a reply from his guest, Guy poured a splash of wine into Michael's glass which he hadn't even taken a sip from.

Setting the bottle back down, Guy pulled back the sleeve of his shirt and flexed his bicep. "We read all the latest on fitness too," he said "Probably spent too much on the home gym like everyone else did during the pandemic." He and Besty shared a laugh.

Amy and Michael remained silent, looking at their neighbors in bewilderment.

"But we take every angle of health seriously," said Besty. We do HIIT, training, LISS Training, yoga, pilates, and Tai Chi."

"And don't forget walking," said Guy.

"Of course," said Besty with a laugh. "Walking is the best form of exercise for longevity. They all walk everywhere in the Blue Zones." Again Betsy and Guy laughed and Amy and Michael remained silent.

"We are like squirrels," said Guy. "A couple of health nuts."  They both laughed at the nonsensical joke.

Then Betsy grew somber. 

"The only part of the Blue Zone lifestyle we have struggled with is community," she said. "We have never had neighbors that would come to dinner with us. In fact none of the residents on this cul-de-sac seem to like us." She grew tearful.

Guy took his wife's hand and looked at his wife lovingly. "But that's all changed now that we have Amy and Michael," he said. "We'll have dinner every night together and we will all live forever."

The couple looked across the table at their guests who sat bound and gagged before them, eyes bulging in horror.

"To good neighbors," said Betsy and Guy raising a toast to each other.