The healing parts

5.1.18-9:58pm

I think I'll stop telling you how I feel the way about you and save it for a love letter because when I have feelings for someone my words are never ending. Honestly since the first day that I saw you, you just caught my eye and my attention somehow and it never stopped it's like I enjoyed seeing you even though we had never talked I just liked you and then in graduation breakfast the first time I actually talked to you after months of just walking past by each other and sitting across from each other and just being strangers I finally had the guts to talked to you because that's when I actually started being myself and I started making fun of you and being mean but you didn't care and it just made me laugh. Deep down I wanted to keep talking to you but there was like 3 people standing in our way literally that's why when I saw you outside I started talking to you again and I felt like I wanted to talk to you all day but we all had to go. And then the next morning at the graduation practice I had the brilliant idea of making fun of your messy hair which made me smile because it was another chance to talk to you again and stare at you because you were in front of me like 2 steps down and I thought you couldn't see me but you just get my attention somehow your soul was just always calling mine they both somehow have tried of getting us together. Months passed by and we are at the same place and same time and notice each other from across a crowded place at the same time but you approached me before I got the chance to actually recognize you since you had dyed your hair burgundy and I had dyed mine a darker shade of black and it's funny how when we were saying our goodbyes to part ways I started talking again and then we started a whole new conversation for like 10 more minutes until you actually had to leave but when we parted ways I started looking for you and talking about you and asking about you with our mutual friends and then my friend convinced me to talk to you through social media and then it became time for us to actually hang out alone and I was nervous  . I was scared that I was going to be awkward and boring  but with you I felt like I could've been myself and I was myself and I was never able to just do that with anyone until I met you I felt so comfortable with you instantly we just clicked as friends I felt like you were a bestfriend already I loved how you were also being yourself oh god I'm smiling just remembering everything and I can't help it laugh just remembering that one day. We actually acted like silly teenagers I remember that in those days I needed a time out like that I was so depressed and empty but suddenly it was like my soul was cleansed with happiness every time it met yours. We just kept talking so much and I kept admiring you, I just thought you were so beautiful, your soul brightened mines each time we saw each other and talked. Time passed I think it was weeks and it was thanksgiving and you were going to spend it alone and I really felt bad and I didn't want you to and I'd rather spend it with you than my family because everything was so messed up that day and nothing felt the same so we both said fuck it and we went to our park and walked around having deep and stupid conversations while I enjoyed every bit of nature and having you around I enjoyed your presence so much it just sucked how you had to go to work that day at night but I was so grateful of spending that day with you instead. We had also talked about my birthday that was coming up and how I didn't want to spend it alone and how I had no plans and that you were my only savior , I was honestly so afraid of being disappointed I was so used to it, used to people cancelling on me. But you never cancelled on me and I was glad I like how you keep your words. Days had passed and it was the day my 20th birthday the big day and I had told you the story before anyone had a chance to hear it on our way to we didn't know where because I was wearing heels and we couldn't go to our park and we were tired of flies flying around our face so you drove us to plaza del sol where we walked around and you helped me to walk cause I don't know how to walk in heels much but I remember us fooling around and me judging almost everything I remember you told me that I was mean but I didn't care but I felt like I had to act mean cause you kept saying you were a bitch and I didn't want you being meaner than me . //5.1.18-9:58pm