Luffy Doesn't Want To Be A Hero

You Guys Seem Pretty Lame

   Luffy had just spent a whole lot of time sitting in an empty room. They said that they would begin to question him shortly, but now it was just starting to piss him off. First, the room was cold and he still had these stupid handcuffs on him. Second, this being the worst thing of all, he didn't have any food whatsoever. No meat, no fruit, no fish, not even a vegetable was given to him no mater how much he asked. Something about him being "a dangerous criminal" or something.

   Finally after what felt like a billion years, some people arrived. A man with a very plain face and a trench coat walked in along with the sleep guy. "Hello, my name is detective Naomasa Tsukauchi. I am simply here to ask you some questions"

   "Ok plain face, but I'm gonna need some food" Plain face looked at the sleepy guy for a moment before turning back to luffy.

   "Look, we can get you some food if you answer the questions" Disappointment flashed on Luffy's face for a moment before he smiled widely.

    "Yeah that's fine, what do you need me to say?" Asked Luffy.

   "What were you planning launching into U.A. high school?"

   "That was a school! You guys totally looked like a bunch of marines to me." 

   "Marines?"

   "Yeah you know, the guys in the white and blue uniforms" Plain face just stared at Luffy blankly for a few seconds.

   "Do you have any history of mental illness?" This question came from the sleep guy. This was starting to get Luffy pretty angry. He keeps having to do a whole lot of thinking, with little to no food. Did he even know what they were talking about? Not in the slightest.

   "What's mental illness. Also, I want meat!" Luffy began to slam his cuffed hand on the table a few times. Boy did that not work. A group of armored people ran in and began to hold him down against the table. Suddenly the detective spoke up again.

   "Let him be. Now, do you have any family we can call?" Call? Through a transponder snail? So far he hadn't seen any and was very confused on how they would contact anyone. Though he didn't really have any choice at this point. The people had release their hold and he could talk.

   "You could call my grandpa, Garp." 

   "Name doesn't really help. Got a number we could dial?"

   "You don't know who my grandpa is?" This surprised Luffy. He must be on some kind of isolated island, because everyone knows Garp. "Then do you guys know the Navy or Marine ford?"

   "Kid, what are you talking about?" This question came from sleepy guy. "Where are you from?"

   "East Blue" The confused looks he got after that made him confused as well. How could they not know anything? "This is pretty lame, can I just get some food and go back to my crew already."

   "Crew? What do you mean by that?"

   "Duh, my pirate crew" Confusion quickly switched to worry. Luffy just thought they already knew, considering they were calling him a criminal. Apparently they didn't.

   "So we can add piracy to the list of charges" The Detective continued.

   "What! What else did I do?"

   "So far its trespassing, child endangerment, breaking and entering, and now piracy. I am curious how deep you will dig your hole?" Welp, now he just had to hope his crew would save him, he was doomed.