ADORE

gray sweatpants and tight black wife-beaters

The Wednesday of the baby shower I picked up the generic gender reveal cake I had bought as a backup plan in case Alexa didn't like my original idea. I thought it was a good and original idea and safer than a whole ass cannon that shoots out confetti, but Alex was a touch ocd which meant everything had to be perfect. Hence why she mostly planned this baby shower herself instead of letting someone else plan it like it was done traditionally. I pulled up to her house in a black off the shoulder sweater dress, tall black boots and my hair tucked into a beanie. Not my cutest outfit ever but what the hell do you wear to a baby shower in winter? I'm freezing my tits off as it is and I'm not even out of my car yet. Walking to the front door with the cake in one hand and gift bag in the other I struggle to ring the doorbell. When the door finally does open it reveals a slightly frazzled Alex. She grabs my arm and tugs me into the house as I take her in. She has a soft yellow floor length sundress that shows off her bump.

 "Wow you look gorgeous Alex." she grips my arm tighter in response and widens her eyes. "What's happening? Why are you looking at me like you just sneezed and peed yourself a little."

 "Ben's family is here!" she whisper hisses. "I did not fucking invite them; I don't even know how they found out but I'm freaking out."

 "Okay let's not panic, first take a deep breath and count to ten." she does as I say then I continue talking. "We have two options. One, I can bitch them out for having the audacity to show up where they aren't wanted. Or two we can take their gifts and money and play nice to their face. If they make one snarky comment to you, I will sneakily put a laxative into their drink, and they'll have to leave anyway because they'll get diarrhea. But either way I'll make them act right because it's your day and you deserve to be relaxed at your baby shower."

 I know she always thinks I'm kidding when I say I'll make someone straighten up but I'm not. I'm five ten and in these boots I'm six feet tall. My dad was six four and the last time I saw him he yelled in my face that I was a whore because I had pierced my tongue at 16. I knocked his fake teeth out of his mouth I hit him so hard. He hasn't spoken to me since. Not that Alex knows any of that because that was when she left for college. I think she still sees me as a broken little kid sometimes and it kind of makes me feel like she thinks she's better than me. I'm strong though, this life has made me build walls and learn to stick up for myself. I snap out of my thoughts when she breathes out a sigh and gives me her answer.

 "I'll just deal with them. The more stuff baby sunny has the better. Now explain to me the reveal plan." 

~

The gift opening goes well, and I glare at any of Ben's family who dare to even get close to Alex. I feel like a guard dog but sometimes that's how you must be. These fake ass southern women with yellow brassy bleach blonde hair and orange spray tans are vicious. They'll say something so harsh you won't forget it for the rest of your life and then they'll tell you that they will pray for you all holier than thou. They use their religion as a mask to be cruel and I hate it. I've always wanted to move away from the bible belt, but my little brother and a lack of funds keep me here. 

Finally, it's time for the gender reveal portion of the baby shower and I stand beside Alexa as she holds up the big balloon I brought in from my car. The group of around 30 guests all count down "five, four, three, two, one!" Alex pops the balloon to reveal... white confetti flowing to the ground. Everyone looks around confused and Alex pretends to start freaking out. "What the hell. What's the gender?" she turns to look right at me "Dee what's going on? Why is it white?" Everyone also turns to look at me.

Then I rip off my beanie to reveal soft pink hair and yell "surprise!" Everyone, including Alex, starts freaking out and jumping up and down. There's a chorus of "it's a girl!" being yelled out. Alex had handed me the envelope with the gender in it from her doctor last week. When I told her my plan for the fake out, she liked it but still didn't know the gender herself. I can see the tears in her eyes as I hug her to me and whisper "you're having a baby girl Alex"