The only one for me || Colby Brock

Part 11 - Relapse and Drugs

(TW: Self harm, drugs)

Clhoie's P.O.V

I had just gotten trough the front door of my apartment, It had been a troubled few days for me. The visit to my brother's place didn't go as planned, i had fucked everything up. I knew that i had always been struggeling, battling addiction and an inner sadness that often left me feeling lost. I knew i have told my family and friends that i was in recovery, but the truth was far from it.

Upon returning home, I felt a familiar urge inside of me. The encounter with Sam had stirred up emotions i had tried to keep buried. In a moment of impulsiveness, i took up my phone and called after my best friend, Eweline. Seeking comfort in the company of someone who understands my struggles. Eweline, with her black hair and brown eyes, was a constant source of support, but maybe not the best person for me to be around. At 24, she had her own battles with depression, but her vibrant and hyped up personality often masked the darkness within her.

It took a couple of minutes before i heard the low knock on my door, I quickly went over twords the door and opend it. Reveling a very tierd looking Eweline, her hair was all over the place and she stunk of whisky. I walked over to her and gave her a big hug, we let go of eatchother and vent into my room.

We sat down on my bed when i started talking to Eweline about my visit with Sam. I explained about how i had been caught drinking by him, an act i had been trying to hide from my family. "I just needed to escape for a while," i told Eweline, my own voice trembling with a mix of shame and sadness. Eweline, understood the struggle all too well. She knew about my addiction all to well, She understood that it was not a choice but a complex web of emotions and past traumas.

"Let's do something to take our minds off things," Eweline suggested, her eyes glinting with a mischievous idea. I looked into her eyes, already knowing what she was talking about. "I know it's not the healthiest option, but we can make tonight about us and forget about the world for a little while." I needed no further convincing. I knew what my friend was proposing. And before i could think more about it, Eweline pulled out a little bag filled with small colurfull pills from her pocket.

A dangerous but familiar ritual. As the substances started to take a hold of them, all of their worries seemed to melt away. They laughed, shared stories, and created a bubble of temporary bliss. But i could still feel the feeling of emtyness and anxiety inside of me. And as the night wore on, my phone started buzzing with an incoming call. I lifted myself up from the floor that i was sitting on to grab my phone, i lifted it up from the bed and looked at it. It was Colby.

Feeling a surge of excitement mixed with nervousness, I excused myself from Ewelyn, who was laying on the floor smoking a joint, And started walking to the bathroom, seeking privacy. My heart raced as i took the phone closer to my ear, answering the call, my emotions heightened by the drugs inside of my system. Colby's voice was filled with concern as he asked about her recent behavior. I felt even more anxiety fill my stomach as i heard him ask me about my addiction.

"I'm fine, really," I tried my best to lie to him, my voice cracking a little. "It was just a one-time thing. I'm over it now." Colby's tone turned stern, his patience wearing thin. "Clhoie, you know you can't keep doing this. You promised me and Sam that you were clean after the rehab. I care about you."

His words cut deep, triggering memories i had tried so hard to get over. I started thinking about my self-harm, all the hidden scar on my body for every time i had felt overwhelmed. As Colby's concern turned into anger, my own fragile state began to unravel. I couldn't bear the thought of disappointing him or Sam anymore, the only two persons i was desperately trying to impress.

"I'm sorry, Colby," i whispered into the phone, my voice breaking. "I'll be fine, I promise." I said quickly as i ended the call, tears streamed down my face. The combination of drugs and my own feelings was too much for me. In a moment of desperation, i sat down on the bathroom floor. I pulled up my sleeve of my hoodie and reached out for the razor on my bathtub, an old habit rearing its ugly head. I began to cut all over my arm, each slice a release of pent-up pain and frustration.

No one's P.O.V

Eweline sat inside if Clhoie's room, still on the floor. She was about to take another pill when she startet sensing something was wrong. She got up from the floor and carefully walked over to the bathroom door.She reached out and knocked on the bathroom door. "Clhoie? Are you okay in there?" She had seen her friend in dark places before, but tonight felt different. As Clhoie opened the door, her eyes downcast, Eweline's heart sank. She knew that look, the one that signaled a storm within.

"What happened?" Eweline asked, her voice gentle but firm. Clhoie couldn't find the words to explain, so she simply held out her arm, revealing the fresh cuts. Eweline's eyes widened, suddenly feeling sober. she pulled her friend into a tight hug. "We need to clean them out okay?." Clhoie only nodded as she sat down on the toilet.

Eweline sat down infront of her on the floor, taking out the paper and alcohol to rub the wound's clean. Everytime she went over one of the cuts she could hear Clhoie vince in pain. 'Im sorry' Eweline said, Everytime.

She reached out for the bandage that Clhoie always had in the cabin under the sink, She started to lingure it around of Clhoie's arm.

.