I can't love you

Nine

Today our parents came back from France.
   Usually I would be excited to run down and greet them but Nick is asleep, his head on my chest.
   I don't know what's gotten into Nicolas lately, but he's been so kind, and he's not being his usual dick headed self.
    "Nick. Nicolas. They're home." I whisper, hearing our parents come upstairs.
    Nick turned around, his back facing me as he went back to sleep.
    "Noah? Where's-"
"I had another panic attack and he comforted me lastnight." I lie, hoping that it was believable.   
    "Oh Noah, I wonder when they're going to stop causing you so much harm, we need to get you into therapy." Mom grabbed my face and examined it.
    "Mama. I'm still tired. I'm gonna lay back down for a while." I say as William walked up behind my mom.
     "Alright then. Rest well, send Nicolas downstairs when he awakens." William spoke, leaving my mom downstairs.
    I closed my door and shook Nick awake.
"I told them I had another panic attack. You do know I suck at lying right?" I say, Nick still trying to process everything I'm saying.
   "I'll cover for you. Just lay down." Nick pulled me onto the bed and squeezed my hand.
Nick hugs me while he's still half asleep and rests his chin my on head.
"You're so warm." Nick sleepily whined.
Our parents knocked on the door and we quickly jumped apart and faced our backs to eachother.
Once they walked in, my mom opened the curtains.
"Cmon guys. Wake up, it's already noon. Shower, get ready for today and start packing for two weeks on a cruise."
I sat up, rubbing my eyes.
"What time are we leaving?" I ask, sliding out of bed.
I throw a pillow at Nick, hoping it would wake him up. And it did.
"Mom said to wake up, shower and get ready for today and start packing." I say, walking to my closet.
"Where are we going?" Nick asks confused.
"Two weeks on the cruise. Including stops to Puerto Rico, the Bahamas, etc." Mom finally got out of the room and I looked at Nick.
"Help me figure out what to wear ?" I smile hopefully. He chuckled and got out of bed.
"Starting with today's outfit. We're gonna match. Wear those black cargo pants and that white shirt. Oh and the Jordan 4's. The whites ones." He said, his finger pointing to everything he had said before he walked out of my room.
I collected the outfit and went into the bathroom to shower.
After my shower I went downstairs to have a quick meal before I started packing.
Nick and I had to pretend the be angry with eachother a few hours out of every day so they wouldn't get suspicious.
"I do have to break some news. You guys are sharing a hotel room." William said, making me and Nick fake glare at eachother.
"Different beds right?" I ask.
"Of course. We leave at 4 this afternoon to get to the departure port so we can board the cruise."
Me and Nick look at each with horror in your eyes before we raced up the stairs.
"Hurry. We have less than two hours to pack." Nick rushed, grabbing our Maletas from the family closet.
He brought mine to me and went into his room to pack.
I made sure to pack extra pajamas, outfits and 5 different bikinis. I also added socks and two hoodies just in case I got cold.
And my own blanket and teddy.
I also packed some menstrual products just in case, and my anxiety pills.
I shoved my makeup bag into my maleta and ran out the room.
"Are you guys ready?" Our parents shouted from the bottom of the stairs.
"I am. I don't know about Nick."
I struggled pulling my Maleta to nicks room.
"You done yet?" I ask, letting go of my maleta.
"I sure am." Nick got up and carried both of our maletas down the stairs with ease.
"We're taking separate cars to the departure port." William spoke, walking outside to the awaiting drivers.
The departure port is almost two hours away, which gave me time for a tiny little nap.
Once we got inside the car after loading the maletas into the truck we headed to the destination.
After twenty minutes I laid my head on Nicks shoulder and closed my eyes, very quickly falling asleep.
He noticed that the position I was sleeping in wasn't very comfortable so he moved my head to his lap, using his hoodie to cover me, shielding me from the air conditioning.
"Driver, could you turn the heat on back here?" Nick politely asked, noticing I was shivering in my sleep.
Nick rested his head on the door and fell asleep as well.