Lucy Chen is in the army, mirroring Tim Bradford's experience

Calm before the storm

The days turned into weeks, and as fall settled in, Lucy found herself immersed in a renewed sense of purpose. She had established a routine that balanced her work, therapy, and the vital connections she had forged with her friends. The changing leaves outside her window served as a beautiful reminder of transformation and growth, and she often paused to reflect on how far she had come.

However, with the changing seasons came an undercurrent of anxiety that Lucy couldn't shake. The darkness that had once engulfed her still lingered, like a distant storm on the horizon. She often felt the familiar tug of her past, a reminder that healing wasn't a straight path but a winding road filled with both progress and setbacks.

One crisp afternoon, Lucy sat in a café with Angela, sipping her favorite pumpkin spice latte. The cozy atmosphere was filled with the comforting sounds of chatter and the aroma of baked goods. As she and Angela chatted about their week, Lucy felt a sense of normalcy wash over her.

"Have you thought about what you want to do for the holidays?" Angela asked, her eyes bright with curiosity. "It'll be here before we know it."

Lucy hesitated, her mind racing. The holidays had always been a challenging time for her. Memories of her military service and the isolation she felt during that period often resurfaced, overshadowing the joy that should accompany the season.

"I'm not sure," she admitted, stirring her drink. "It's a bit daunting to think about being around family and friends with everything that's happened."

Angela reached across the table, squeezing Lucy's hand. "You don't have to go through this alone. We can plan something together, something that feels safe and comforting for you."

Lucy smiled at her friend's unwavering support. "That sounds nice. Maybe we can do a friends' holiday gathering instead of the usual family stuff. Just us, you know?"

"Absolutely! We'll make it special," Angela replied, her enthusiasm infectious.

As they continued their conversation, Lucy felt a sense of relief wash over her. Planning a holiday with her friends felt like a step toward reclaiming a part of her life that had long felt out of reach.

However, as the weeks passed, Lucy's sense of calm was disrupted by a series of sleepless nights. The dreams that had plagued her in the past began to resurface—nightmares filled with the sounds of gunfire, the cries of her fellow soldiers, and the oppressive weight of memories she had tried so hard to bury. Each night, she would wake in a cold sweat, heart racing, and find herself grappling with the same questions that haunted her: Would she ever be free from the shadows of her past?

Despite her efforts to stay grounded, she found herself retreating into old habits. When the anxiety became too overwhelming, she would isolate herself, spending hours alone in her apartment, wrestling with her emotions. During those dark moments, the familiar urge to self-harm crept back into her mind, whispering insidiously that it could provide a temporary release from her pain.

One particularly sleepless night, after a vivid nightmare left her shaken, Lucy found herself sitting on her bathroom floor, staring at the razor blade in her hand. The internal struggle intensified as she fought against the familiar urge.

"Not again," she whispered to herself, tears streaming down her face. "You can do this. You're stronger than this."

She dropped the blade and picked up her phone, scrolling through her contacts until she found Angela's name. With trembling hands, she typed out a message.

"Can you come over? I need help."

Angela responded almost instantly. "I'm on my way."