Walter x Henry - a secret love story

Chapter 8 - I'm sorry

Henry's pov

I didn't know how much time passed after I stormed out of the room. Days blurred together, and I couldn't stop thinking about the look on Walter's face before I left. The tears in his eyes, the way his voice broke when he said he missed how we used to be - it played over and over in my head like some kind of nightmare I couldn't escape.

I thought pushing him away would make things easier. I thought I needed space, time to figure things out on my own. But the more I distanced myself from him, the worse I felt. Every time I walked past him in the hallway, saw him sitting alone at lunch, or caught a glimpse of him looking down at his feet, it hit me how much I'd hurt him. And the truth was, I missed him too. More than I wanted to admit.

I missed the way he'd smile at me when he thought I wasn't looking, or how his laugh would fill up the room when I'd say something stupid. I missed holding him close at night, the warmth of his body next to mine. I missed how easy it used to be between us. I'd been rough with him, I knew that. I wasn't good at talking about my feelings, and when things got hard, my instinct was to push everyone away. But that wasn't what I wanted anymore. Not with Walter.

I couldn't stop thinking about how much I cared about him. Even when I tried to push it down, it kept coming back, hitting me harder every time. I did care about him. More than I'd ever cared about anyone. And I didn't want to lose him.

One evening, after days of avoiding him, I found myself standing outside our dorm room. My hand hovered over the door handle, and I hesitated. Part of me was scared. Scared of what he might say. Scared I'd messed things up too much to fix. But the thought of losing him for good felt worse than anything. So I took a deep breath, opened the door, and stepped inside.

Walter was sitting on his bed, his back turned to me. He didn't even look up when I came in. The silence between us felt heavy, like it was pressing down on me, making it hard to breathe. I knew I needed to say something, but the words stuck in my throat.

"Walter," I said softly, finally breaking the silence.

He didn't move, didn't say anything. Just sat there, staring at the floor. I took a few steps closer, feeling my heart pound in my chest. I couldn't mess this up. Not again.

"I'm sorry," I said, my voice low but steady. "For everything."

He still didn't look up, but I could see his shoulders tense a little. I knew he was listening, even if he wasn't ready to talk yet. I sat down on the edge of his bed, close but not too close, giving him space.

"I've been a jerk," I continued, the words coming out slowly. "I shouldn't have pushed you away. I didn't mean what I said before. You're not too much, and this... this wasn't a mistake."

Finally, he turned his head slightly, just enough for me to see his face. His eyes were red and puffy, and my chest tightened with guilt. I hated that I was the reason he looked like that.

"I just didn't know how to handle things," I said, trying to explain but not making excuses. "I've never been good at talking about how I feel. And I guess I got scared. But I don't want to lose you, Walter. I don't want to keep hurting you."

He didn't say anything for a long moment, and I could see the doubt in his eyes. I had hurt him too much for it to be fixed with a few words. I knew that. But I needed him to know how I really felt.

"I care about you," I said quietly, my voice shaking a little. "More than I've ever cared about anyone. And... I'm sorry I didn't show that before. I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me."

Walter wiped at his eyes, looking down at his hands, and I could see he was trying not to cry again. It broke my heart, knowing I'd caused him so much pain. I reached out, hesitating for just a second before gently touching his arm.

"I love you, Walter," I said, the words slipping out before I could stop them.

He looked up at me then, his eyes wide with surprise. I wasn't sure I'd ever said those words to anyone before. Not like this. But I meant it. I meant every word. My heart raced as I waited for him to say something, to react, but for a second, he just stared at me.

"You... you love me?" he whispered, like he couldn't believe it.

I nodded, my throat tight. "Yeah. I do."

Walter blinked a few times, and then, to my relief, he smiled. It was small and a little shaky, but it was a smile. I felt something inside me ease, like maybe I hadn't completely ruined everything after all.

"I love you too," he said softly, and hearing him say it made my chest swell with relief and happiness.

Before I could say anything else, Walter leaned forward and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a tight hug. I hugged him back, holding on like I never wanted to let go. I could feel his breath against my neck, and for the first time in days, things felt right again.

"I'm sorry too," he whispered, his voice muffled against my shoulder. "I didn't mean to push you either. I just... I missed you."

I pulled back a little, just enough to look at him, and wiped away the tear that had slipped down his cheek. "I missed you too," I said, and I meant it more than anything.

We stayed like that for a while, just holding each other, neither of us saying anything more. We didn't need to. Things weren't perfect yet, and I knew we still had a lot to figure out, but for the first time in what felt like forever, I felt hopeful. We'd get through it. Together.

And I wasn't going to lose him. Not again.

***

Author's note

This is kind of an apology chapter for the other heartbreaking ones, I hope you liked it