Panic attacks
i dont know what it is about them
how they make your body all shivery,
how youre holding in tears
when you have to sit down because you get that hit of gravity that makes you feel like your on jupiter
how it feels when that ice cold water hits your tongue when you go straight for water because for some reason, in all of this chaos, your heavy breathing, your mind racing, your body shaking, your mouth just suddenly dries up.
i dont know why
i probably never will
all i know is i hate panic attacks
they just hit you
even at the littlest times
even when the thing triggering your panic atrack is so small you almost cant see it
it doesnt feel small
not with your body shaking
not with the gravity pulling you down
not with the tears slowly emerging from your eyes, soon turning into a sob
i dont understand why i got the curse of panic attacks, sure other people i know have them too, but not as much as me
i cry a lot
i cry about the biggest things
i cry about the smallest things
i dont know why
i just do
it sucks
it causes panic and anxiety attacks
sometimes those cause asthma attacks
then i need my inhaler
i hate crying
sure its good for you
and it feels good to release it
but when i cry i need someone
then i have to explain why im crying and hope their not mad
i dont know why they would be mad
maybe i woke them up
maybe im botherimg them
maybe their tired of me always crying
maybe its my fault why im crying and i caused the problem
i always cry and cry and cry and cry and cry
and mom says crying is good and then yell at me when i am cryimg
they yell at me for the thimg that made me cry
they yell at me for cryimg
like seriously
if you want someone to stop cryimg
dont yell at them
comfort them
because 50% of the time they are crying because you started yelling at them
i love crying
i hate crying
i hate panic attack
