The Rhodes Method

twenty-four

I'm not afraid of you now
Villain and violent
Infant and innocent
Baby, both arms cradle you now
Both arms cradle you now
--- forwards beckon rebound, Adrianne Lenker

OCTAVIA RHODES

I'm not grounded that often, at least not as much as Damien was at my age. Before turning eighteen, he was stuck inside the house most of the time because it was the punishment Raymond resorted to whenever Damien acted out. But my older brother still found ways around our father's control. He'd sneak out to catch up with friends and only show up the next morning with bruises and red eyes.

At the time, Myles and I had school, and Logan and Vince did not live at home. And since Rayond had work, no one could keep an eye on him so these outings became more regular. 

While he had no one making sure he was staying inside, I am unfortunately not graced with such lenience. I cannot take a step out of my room without feeling the harsh stares of one of my brother's on my back. And it's the worst two brothers too. Logan will do anything to make sure I stick to the rules and who knows what Vince will do with this newfound knowledge that I have visited my father.

It's not completely bad for me. I don't have my phone, and I can't leave the house, and I have no siblings to pester, but Vince has not taken away my hockey gear. So I spend my days in the yard. Tossing the puck in the air, lost in my thoughts. Wondering how I'll find a way outside of this house to find Damien and force him for answers.

My days are slow. Soon it is a week since my grounding. A week since Damien has left. A few since Myles was sent away.

I am surprised by a phone call from him on a random Monday morning. Before Vince leaves for work, he wordlessly hands me his phone. I drop my spoon back into my bowl of oats and stare at the device, wondering why my oldest brother is so willing to hand me his device when he was pretty adamant about me being restricted from any technology a few days ago.

He rolls his eyes at me when I do not motion to grab it. It is then that he explains to me that Myles has a scheduled call in five minutes.

"Audio call," he explains, "in a few weeks we'll be able to video call him."

I swallow and take the phone from him. Vince does not leave the room, in fact, he stands pretty close to me, as if he's anticipating that I'll somehow call my father and arrange another meeting.

As Vince stated, his phone rings in five minutes. I haven't been able to stomach any more of my breakfast in anticipation. This is the longest time I have spent without my youngest older brother by my side. For a moment, a single moment, I am worried that he won't be the same.

I'm proven wrong very quickly.

"Octavia," Myles announces loudly. "You were grounded?"

I screw my eyes closed and groan. Loud enough so Myles gets the message that I do not want to talk about it.

He hears my message. That doesn't mean he listens.

"What did you do?" Myles continues. "Did you commit a crime? Is Vince growing grey hairs?"

"Myles," Vince says loudly, indicating his presence in the room.

My brother goes quiet suddenly. "Oh. Hi Vince."

Vince scoffs, but there is a small smile that plays on his face. He has to finish getting ready for work, so he begrudgingly leaves me with a stern look before he exits the room.