Sugar sugar baby

[34] A fresh start

It had been a month since I decided to stop torturing myself over Vanessa. The first few days had been brutal, filled with lingering thoughts and doubts, wondering if she would ever reach out or if I had made the right call by leaving it all behind. But as the days turned into weeks, I slowly began to feel the weight lift.

Sure, I still thought about her sometimes. How could I not? She'd been a huge part of my life for a while. The memories didn't just disappear overnight. But I was done letting those memories control me. Instead, I was focusing on the one thing that had always been mine: my ambition. I needed to get back on the grind, back to working on something that was mine, something I could build with my own hands.

I'd spent the last couple of weeks brainstorming ideas for a new business—something fresh, something that felt right. The restaurant had been a dream that crashed and burned, but that didn't mean I was done. I just needed a new direction.

One evening, I sat in a quiet café, my laptop open in front of me, a notebook beside it filled with scribbled ideas. I was on my second cup of coffee, my mind buzzing with possibilities. I had been toying with the idea of starting something tech-related—something scalable, something that could grow fast.

As I leaned back in my chair, tapping my pen against the notebook, my phone buzzed on the table. It was Sasha, checking in as she had been doing for the past month.

Sasha: "Hey, how's it going? Still grinding? Or did you finally decide to take a break for once?"

I smiled, typing a quick response.

Me: "Still grinding, obviously. No time for breaks when you're trying to build an empire."

Sasha: "Classic Tristan. What are you working on this time?"

I hesitated for a second, looking down at my notes. I wasn't ready to share the full details yet, mostly because I was still figuring them out myself. But I gave her a rough idea.

Me: "Thinking about starting a tech platform. Something in the service industry, but more streamlined. I'll let you know when I've got more to share."

Sasha: "Of course you are. I wouldn't expect anything less. Keep me posted!"

I set my phone down, my mind drifting back to the project in front of me. It felt good to have something to focus on again, something that wasn't tied to the wreckage of my past with Vanessa. This project was mine, and if it succeeded—or if it failed—that was on me. There was something comforting in that. No one else's expectations, no one else's money, just my own sweat and effort.

After a few more hours of research and planning, I headed back to my apartment. It wasn't anything fancy—just a small place downtown with a view of the street below—but it was mine. And for now, that was enough.

As I walked through the door, I couldn't help but think about how far I'd come in the last few weeks. It wasn't that I didn't still think about Vanessa—her name would pop up in my mind every now and then, a memory of her laugh or the way she'd smile when she thought no one was watching—but it wasn't all-consuming anymore. It wasn't something that kept me from moving forward.

I set my stuff down on the counter, grabbing a beer from the fridge. As I cracked it open, I allowed myself a small moment of reflection. One month. That's how long it had been since I left Milan, since I walked away from a life that had seemed so perfect on the outside but had crumbled underneath.

"Here's to new beginnings," I muttered to myself, raising the bottle in a mock toast before taking a long drink.

I had spent enough time wallowing. Now, it was time to get back to what I did best—hustling, grinding, and building something real.

***

The next day, I was back at it. My desk was cluttered with sketches, notes, and articles I'd printed out for inspiration. I'd spent hours refining the concept for my new project, and now it was starting to take shape in a way that felt real. I was working on an app—a service that would make it easier for freelancers in the service industry to connect with clients. It wasn't a revolutionary idea, but I knew I could do it better than what was out there.

By midday, I was on a call with Josh, a developer friend of mine from college. We hadn't spoken much in the past year, but I knew he was the guy to talk to if I wanted to bring this idea to life.

"So, you want to build an app that connects freelancers with clients, but you want it to be more streamlined, right?" Josh asked, his voice crackling through the speaker.

"Exactly," I said, pacing the length of my apartment as I talked. "The current platforms are too cluttered, too bloated. I want something simple, efficient. No bullshit."

Josh laughed. "That sounds like something you'd say. But yeah, I get it. I think it's doable. What's your timeline looking like?"

I paused, running a hand through my hair. "Well, I want to get a prototype up and running within a month or two. It doesn't have to be perfect, just functional. Can you make that happen?"

Josh was quiet for a moment, probably thinking it through. "Yeah, I can make that work. I'll need to bring in a designer, though, to make sure the UI is clean."

"Do it," I said, feeling a surge of excitement. This was happening. "I'll send over some notes and sketches I've been working on. Let me know what you think."

"Alright, man. I'm in. Let's make this happen."

After the call ended, I sat back at my desk, staring at the notes in front of me. The app was still in the early stages, but I could already see the potential. This was the kind of project that could take off if I played my cards right.

I spent the next few hours buried in work, making calls, reaching out to contacts, and refining the details. Every now and then, Vanessa would creep into my mind, but I pushed the thoughts aside. I had something bigger to focus on now, something that was going to take all of my energy.

By the end of the day, I felt more alive than I had in months. The project was moving forward, the pieces were starting to fall into place, and for the first time in a long time, I felt like I was in control of my life again.

Maybe I'd never get the closure I wanted with Vanessa, but that was okay. I was moving on, one step at a time. And with this new business, I had something real to pour myself into—something that was mine.

Q: What would you do next?