RUMINATION

0 0 0
ni hirayamanawari91
ni hirayamanawari91
                                    
                                              RUMINATION
By:Hiraya Manawari

Should i start with sharing my invalid feelings?
Oh who am i kidding
How could i say such thing?
No one want to hear nor know a think

Like how to describe myself?
Should i be rose with nothing left?
Should i be a mirror?
Or should i be a painting?

If i were a rose
You wont see me grow
As all my petals are already blown
Now all i have left are thorns

If i were a mirror 
id be broken and shattered
Or cast in the shadow
Where no one will know

If i were a painting 
the color would be dark as a crow
Some can be white as snow
But never as bright as her

I guess thats how i am
But who am i really?
Oh no! did i use too many mask
Wait!? What did "I" just ask?

I am already tired
With all the mask i already use
To mask it all like its all "ok"
But is there really no other way?

For it to be just like back then
No stress,just free
No problem, just happy
Too naive to know a thing

I miss her
But i lost her
No... i killed her
I'm sorry

I did that to protect her
The world is too cruel
And she's just too pure
To bare it all
And i don't think i can see her in despair

So i hope you understand
Where i am coming at
I did it for her
She's just too pure

She wanted to grow up quickly
She thought everything was easy
She thought everyone is as kind as her
She's too naive to know the truth

All i wanted was to hide her'
But she's too stubborn
She always let her emotion get the best of her
She's always fighting

So i had no choice
Everyone hurt her
Everyone disappointed her
Everyone expected a lot from her

She always give
But never get
She always put others first
But never been her

All she wanted to do was to help
So why do you have to torment her in return
Can't you see?
 She's tired

So i made a choice
I killed her
It was against her will
And it hurts to feel

I'm sorry 
I was a coward
But i hope you understand
I did it for us

The future is unknown
But i try to predict it
Like it is a show
So that we know

I am too afraid 
To make the same mistake
Don't get too attached
So just sit there and watch

I guess this is my ending
As i have shown you the beginning
To where i started 
And where i ended 

Please let this be a lesson
To never let your inner child be in person
Let that child out
And guide that chile to figure everything out