Edge Of The Ice (On Going And Own Book)

Fractures Beneath The ice. 33

Dinner passed in a blur. Alex picked at his food, only half-listening to the conversation at the table. His mom talked about work, something about a new project at the office, while Maddie chimed in about a debate she had won at school. His dad, as usual, was quieter, offering a few comments here and there between bites.

Alex nodded along, offering the occasional “yeah” or “that’s cool,” but his mind was somewhere else. He couldn’t stop thinking about Cass’s disappointed expression, the pressure from Coach Greene, and the way his chest felt like it was caving in.

“Alex, honey, you okay?” his mom asked, her voice pulling him back to the present. She gave him one of those concerned looks that moms are so good at.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he mumbled, pushing his mashed potatoes around with his fork.

“You’ve barely touched your food,” she pressed gently. “You sure everything’s alright?”

Alex tensed, feeling the weight of everyone’s eyes on him. He hated this—hated how much of his stress was starting to spill over into everything. But he wasn’t sure how to explain it without sounding like he couldn’t handle things.

“I’m just tired,” he lied, forcing a smile. “Long practice.”

Maddie gave him a sidelong glance, but didn’t say anything. His mom didn’t seem convinced, but she let it go, turning the conversation back to Maddie’s debate victory.

His dad finally spoke up, his voice calm but serious. “You’ve got regionals coming up soon, right? How’s the team looking?”

Alex’s stomach tightened. The last thing he wanted to talk about was hockey. “Yeah, we’re getting ready. Coach is being tough on us, but we’ll be fine.”

His dad nodded, but there was something else in his eyes. He didn’t push further, but Alex could feel the silent pressure—his dad had always expected a lot from him, especially when it came to sports. It wasn’t like his dad was harsh about it, but Alex knew how much it meant to him. And that only made the pressure worse.

After dinner, Alex escaped to his room, closing the door behind him with a sigh of relief. He collapsed onto his bed, staring at the ceiling as the silence settled in around him. His phone buzzed again, pulling him out of his thoughts.

It was a message from Leo.

Leo: You good, man?

Alex: Yeah, just wiped. Coach was on my case today.

Leo: Same here. Dude was in a mood. We still hanging tomorrow?

Alex hesitated. He had told Cass he’d see them after practice, but Leo was expecting to hang out. The guilt gnawed at him. He couldn’t keep pulling in two different directions, but every time he thought about choosing one thing over the other, the weight doubled.

Alex: Yeah, I’m down.

Leo sent a thumbs up emoji, and Alex tossed his phone onto the bed, staring back up at the ceiling. He should have felt relieved, but instead, the knot in his chest tightened.

A soft knock on the door broke the silence.

“Come in,” Alex called, sitting up.

The door creaked open, and Maddie slipped inside, her eyes full of concern. “You sure you’re okay?” she asked, closing the door behind her.

Alex sighed, rubbing his face with his hands. “I don’t know, Mads. It just feels like everything’s too much right now.”

Maddie crossed the room and sat down at the foot of his bed, her expression softening. “You don’t have to do everything perfectly, Alex. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed.”

“I just don’t want to let anyone down,” he muttered, his voice barely above a whisper. “Coach is already on me, and I’ve got regionals coming up. And then there’s Cass… I feel like I’m messing everything up.”

Maddie gave him a sympathetic look. “You’re not messing anything up. You’re just human. And I’m pretty sure Cass knows that too.”

He wanted to believe her, but the weight of everything still sat heavy on his chest. “I just wish it wasn’t all happening at once.”

Maddie scooted closer, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. “You’ll figure it out. And if you need help, we’re all here for you, okay?”

Alex nodded, leaning into her hug for a moment. It was comforting, even if it didn’t solve everything. Maddie always had a way of making him feel like he wasn’t completely alone.

After she left, Alex lay back down, his thoughts still buzzing. He wasn’t sure how to fix things—how to balance hockey, Cass, and the pressure building up inside him. But as he stared up at the ceiling, he knew one thing: something had to give. And soon.