Unbroken Vows

Chapter 21

Mew sat silently on the couch, watching Tul from a distance. He couldn’t help but notice the subtle changes in Tul’s behavior, the little ways his once vibrant and confident partner had withered. Tul was no longer the carefree person Mew had fallen in love with. Now, he was a man filled with self-doubt, his every movement laced with hesitation.

Tul was playing with their children—Tryan, Mayera, and Mayesha—in the living room, carefully arranging toys and ensuring that everything was perfect for them. Mayera, the more curious one, was tugging at her father’s shirt.
“Papa, look!” she said, showing off a small drawing she had made of their family.
Tul smiled softly, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “It’s beautiful, sweetheart,” he said, kissing her forehead gently.

Mew couldn’t help but notice how Tul's smile never lasted long these days. The moment his daughters or son left his side, Tul’s face would shift back to the haunted expression that had become all too familiar.

Later that night, as they prepared for bed, the tension was palpable. Mew noticed the scars on Tul’s body—the marks left by Max’s abuse. Tul caught Mew’s gaze lingering on them and immediately looked away, pulling the blanket up to cover himself. His voice trembled as he spoke.

“You... you don’t like looking at me anymore, do you?” Tul whispered, his eyes downcast.
Mew’s heart sank. He moved closer to Tul, pulling him into a gentle embrace. “Don’t say that, Tul. I love you more than anything in this world. I don’t care about the scars or the marks... none of that matters to me.”

Tul pulled away, shaking his head. “But it does to me! Every time you look at me, I can see the pity in your eyes. I’m not... I’m not who I was anymore. I’m broken, Mew. How could you still love me when I don’t even love myself?"

Mew took a deep breath, fighting back the urge to cry. He knew Tul’s pain ran deep, and no matter how much he tried to help, the trauma would take time to heal. But he wasn’t going to give up.

“Tul,” Mew said softly, cupping Tul’s face in his hands. “I don’t want you to worry about what you think I see. You are still the most beautiful person to me, inside and out. But I know this isn’t about me... it’s about you. You need to feel safe and comfortable, and I’m going to make sure that happens. I will never push you. I will wait until you’re ready.”

Tul's tears welled up as he nodded slightly, feeling the warmth of Mew’s words sink in.
“I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready,” Tul whispered. “There are so many memories… so much pain.” He hesitated before continuing, “And... I’m afraid that if I’m not enough for you... if we never... get back to the way things were... you’ll leave me.”

Mew’s eyes widened in shock. He hadn’t realized just how deep Tul’s fears went.
“Tul, no. Don’t ever think that,” Mew said firmly. “I will never leave you. Not for anything, not for anyone. You are my family, and I’m not going anywhere. Intimacy isn’t what defines our love. Our love is in every moment we share, in every touch, every smile. That’s what matters.”

Tul looked down at his hands, his voice trembling again. “But I can’t help it. I’m afraid. I’m afraid I’m not enough for you... and... and I’m afraid I’m not a good mother to our children. I love them so much, but... I feel like I’m failing them.”
Mew’s heart ached hearing Tul voice these doubts. He placed a gentle hand on Tul’s chin, lifting his face so their eyes met.

“Tul, you are an amazing mother. Our children love you more than anything. I see it in their eyes every time they look at you. You care for them, you nurture them, you make sure they are happy and safe. That’s what makes you a good mother. Don’t ever doubt that.”

Tul’s lips trembled as tears began to fall, and Mew pulled him into a tight embrace. “I know it’s hard right now, but you don’t have to go through this alone. I’m here with you. Always.”

Tul clung to Mew, feeling the weight of his fears slowly lift, though the pain and doubt still lingered.

The next morning, Tul was back to his usual routine, though Mew could tell he was still haunted. He busied himself with the children, picking out toys for Tryan and styling Mayera and Mayesha’s hair with little bows and accessories. The girls giggled as Tul fussed over them, his hands shaking ever so slightly as he braided their hair.

“You look like little princesses,” Tul said, smiling softly as he admired his work. The girls grinned back, wrapping their tiny arms around him.
“Papa, you’re the best!” Mayesha exclaimed.
Tul’s heart swelled at their words. For a brief moment, he felt the joy that he used to experience so easily before everything happened. His children were his light, his reason to keep going.

Mew watched from the doorway, admiring how Tul poured all of his love and energy into their children. It was in these moments that Tul seemed happiest. Yet, the nights were still difficult.

Later that evening, as they sat together on the couch, Mew gently took Tul’s hand in his, squeezing it for reassurance.
“I want to talk to you about something,” Mew began. Tul glanced at him curiously, but there was hesitation in his eyes.

“What is it?” Tul asked softly.
“I’ve been thinking about everything you’ve been through... the abuse, the trauma... all of it. I can’t begin to imagine how hard it’s been for you. But I think we need to talk about it. I want to help you heal, Tul.”
Tul tensed up, immediately pulling his hand away. “I... I don’t want to talk about it,” he said quickly.

“I understand that,” Mew replied gently. “But I think it’s important for us... for you. I need to know how you’re feeling, what’s going on inside your head. I want to be there for you, but I can’t do that if you don’t let me in.”
Tul’s eyes filled with tears again as he looked at Mew. “I’m scared,” he admitted in a shaky voice. “Every time I think about it, it’s like I’m back there, in that room, with Max... I feel like I can’t breathe. I don’t want to relive it.”

Mew nodded, understanding the depth of Tul’s pain. He leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on Tul’s forehead. “We don’t have to rush. We’ll take it one day at a time. But I’m not going anywhere. You’re not alone in this.”

Tul clung to Mew, his body shaking as he cried. Mew held him tightly, vowing to protect him and their family no matter what.

And though his love for Tul never wavered, the anger and hatred for his parents grew with every tear Tul shed. They had caused this pain, and Mew was determined to make them pay. But for now, his focus was on Tul, on healing their little family, and on helping Tul rebuild himself one step at a time.

To be continued...