in my dreams. - P.J.

xv : let this be a sign

XV.      ANYA   !
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let this be a sign

Anya had gotten up earlier than the others, so early the sun had just started to rise. She had fallen asleep earlier than usual and realized she enjoyed how . . . quiet the morning was. They were all asleep, and their dreams weren't her mother's territory. Which meant she had a peaceful morning all to herself to do what she pleased. That's why Anya enjoyed her alone time. It wasn't the fact she wasn't lonely, but it was the fact her brain wasn't screaming at her for once. Anya took advantage of it. She showered, got ready, even managed to meditate in order to clear her mind for the chaos of the next few hours. Anya wore a brown corduroy skirt, with a t-shirt which had a Breakfast at Tiffany's logo. She wore the same blue Converse she always had on, seeing as it was the only shoes she brought. Today, Anya decided to leave her hair down. It looked nice enough. In fact, after it dried Anya noticed it looked even nicer than usual. Nothing was different, not physically at least. But Anya was looking at it in a new light.

Her friends always wondered why she dressed nicer than usual. Back at the Wilderness School, it was only jeans and a t-shirt that they swore was the same three shirts ( because they were ). But they didn't understand. Anya had went from having everything to having nothing at the age of twelve. She was stripped of her money, of her life and luxury. Now that she had gotten the chance at camp to at least have something, she was going to take it. They probably wouldn't understand, especially Piper. Piper had the life Anya had and got taken away, but she takes it for granted. Just once, she wanted Piper in her shoes. Riches to rags.

Maybe that's why Anya got so upset at Piper before. Because she had what Anya wanted. What she used to have, and she treated it like nothing. As if it was a burden to carry. But a burden was sleeping on a bench. A burden was losing everything overnight. Piper didn't know what it felt like.

Speaking of Piper . . .

"Come in," Anya called to the girl standing behind her door, about to knock. She heard Piper mentally curse and enter Anya's room. "Hey. . ."

"Hey," Piper said. She was exhausted. Anya read Piper had She was scared about the conversation they were about to had, Anya knew it. But it was a conversation they had to have. "Anya . . . I am so sorry. Really, I am."

"Sit, Piper," Anya's voice was gentle. She led Piper to the her bed and had her sit down. Taking a seat next to her made her remember so many little details about Piper's life. Growing up rich and still having those riches, the beauty she was gifted with, the persuasion she was gifted, Piper was lucky. Anya's one wish was for her to understand that.

"You're too good, Anya," Piper whispered.

No, Anya wasn't too good. She contradicted the entire way of thinking, the rules of the universe. How could she be even close to good?

"You're too blind," Anya answered honestly. This caught Piper off guard, such a simple and blunt statement from her. "Piper, you truly don't understand how alike we are."

"Alike? Anya—"

"No, no," Anya interrupted her. "Just listen, please? You and I . . . we grew up with similar wealth. You were new and I was old, yes but . . . Imagine that was all lost. You may think you'd be okay, but no matter how humble one is . . it still affects them."

Piper only listened, letting the words seek in. Anya knew she could continue. "I lost everything. Not just a few clothes and jewelry, Piper. Everything. My house, my belongings, my family. I went from everything to nothing. Can you imagine?"