Choice of Love

Chapter 19: Confronting the Past

The air felt heavy as Jason and I walked through the cold, sterile halls of the county jail. Each step echoed ominously, a reminder of the confrontation we were about to face. My side still ached where Ethan's friends had hurt me, but that pain was nothing compared to the weight I carried inside—knowing that I was about to face Ethan again.

Jason's hand was warm around mine, his grip tightening as we approached the visitation room. "You sure you're ready for this?" he asked, concern laced in his voice.

I nodded, though my heart hammered in my chest. "Yeah. I need to see him. I need to know why."

Jason sighed but gave a supportive squeeze to my hand. "I'll be right here the whole time. We'll face this together."

When we reached the room, a guard escorted us inside, and there, behind a glass barrier, sat Ethan. He was in the standard orange jumpsuit, and though his posture was rigid and defiant, his face showed traces of exhaustion. His usually sharp grey eyes seemed dull, as if the reality of his situation had started to sink in.

Ethan looked up as we entered, his gaze flicking between Jason and me. The anger in his eyes was immediate, but there was something else lurking beneath it—something that softened the edge of his fury. I could see the moment his eyes fell on my bandaged side, his expression flickering, almost imperceptibly, into something close to regret.

We sat down across from him, separated by the glass, and picked up the phone that would allow us to speak.

"You came," Ethan said, his voice low and gravelly. His eyes burned into mine, full of unresolved emotion. "Why?"

I hesitated for a moment before answering. "I needed to understand why, Ethan. Why did it have to come to this? You tried to hurt us—me. You weren't always like this."

He clenched his jaw, his fingers gripping the phone tightly. "You don't get it, do you, Lesley?" he spat, though the venom in his words seemed forced. "I had no choice! You were supposed to be mine! But you threw me away for him." He shot a glare at Jason, who remained silent, watching Ethan with a mix of calm and guarded tension.

"I didn't throw you away," I said, my voice firm but tinged with sadness. "I loved you once, Ethan. But things changed. You changed. You can't force someone to stay with you just because you want them to."

Ethan's face contorted in anger, his fists clenching on the table. "You don't know what it felt like to lose you like that! To watch you run off with him after everything we had."

Jason finally spoke up, his voice steady. "It wasn't about you, Ethan. It was about the way you treated her. You started losing Lesley long before I came into the picture. You have to accept that."

Ethan glared at Jason, the fury in his eyes unmistakable. But then his gaze softened, just for a moment, when he looked back at me. "I never meant for them to hurt you," he admitted quietly, his voice cracking. "Not like that. It wasn't supposed to go that far."

I swallowed, the tension in the air thick. "But it did, Ethan. You let it happen. You set it all in motion."

For a moment, Ethan's defiance wavered, and I saw the boy I had once known, the one who had been caring and protective in the beginning. His eyes flickered to the bandages on my side, his brow furrowing. "Are you... okay?" The question sounded almost foreign coming from him, as if it had slipped out without him meaning to ask.

I took a deep breath, surprised by the genuine concern in his voice. "I'll be fine. It's going to take time, but I'll heal."

Ethan looked away, his hands shaking slightly. "I didn't want it to end like this," he muttered. "I just wanted... I don't know. I didn't think it through."

"You didn't think it through because you were blinded by anger," Jason said, his voice calm but stern. "You didn't see the damage you were causing until it was too late."

Ethan's face twisted, a mixture of regret and bitterness. He slammed his fist onto the table, though the sound was muted by the glass. "I never wanted to hurt you, Lesley!" he shouted, his eyes glistening with frustration. "But now... now it's all gone. Everything. And it's my fault, isn't it?"

I didn't know what to say. Part of me wanted to yell at him, to tell him exactly how much he had hurt me, how much damage he had done. But seeing him there, broken and lost, I couldn't bring myself to hate him completely.

"You need help, Ethan," I said quietly. "You need to get better. What happened between us is over, but that doesn't mean you can't fix things for yourself."

He looked at me with a mixture of disbelief and sorrow. "You really think I can fix this? After everything I've done?"

Jason, who had been silently observing, spoke up again. "You can't take back what you did, Ethan. But you can decide what you do next. You need to own your mistakes and deal with the consequences. Only then can you even think about moving forward."

Ethan stared at us, his anger and guilt battling behind his eyes. For the first time in a long while, he looked vulnerable. His voice wavered as he spoke, "I don't know if I can."

"You can," I said softly. "But it's up to you."

There was a long pause, the three of us sitting there, connected by the painful past we shared and the uncertain future ahead. Eventually, Ethan hung his head, unable to look at either of us anymore. "I'm sorry," he whispered, the words barely audible through the glass.

I nodded, feeling a strange sense of closure begin to settle over me. "I hope you find peace, Ethan."

Jason squeezed my hand, and together, we stood up. As we turned to leave, Ethan's voice stopped us one last time.

"Lesley... take care of yourself," he said, his tone softer, almost pleading.

I looked back at him, offering a small, sad smile. "You too, Ethan."

And with that, we walked out of the jail, leaving behind the man who had once been a part of my life, but who now had to face the consequences of his choices alone.

As the heavy doors closed behind us, I felt Jason's arm wrap protectively around me. For the first time in a long while, I felt like I could finally breathe again. We had faced Ethan, confronted the pain of the past, and now, it was time to start healing—for real this time.