Choice of Love

Chapter 4: Fractured Loyalties

The afternoon sunlight spilled into the classroom as I absentmindedly doodled in my notebook, my mind far from the lecture. Ethan's possessive behavior had always been there, but now, after last night with Jason, I was seeing it with fresh eyes. The suffocating control I had once brushed off as protectiveness now felt oppressive, and I couldn't shake the feeling of guilt gnawing at me for not being completely honest with him.

Jason had texted me earlier, just a simple message: "Hey, hope you're doing alright after last night. No hard feelings." But those words echoed in my mind. The thing was, I wasn't alright. I didn't know how to feel about Jason, Ethan, or even myself at this point.

"Lesley." Ethan's voice broke through my thoughts, jolting me back to reality. He stood at the door of the classroom, his grey eyes focused on me. There was something different in his expression today—something darker, as if last night's conversation had left a mark.

I glanced around, feeling the weight of his presence as my classmates slowly trickled out for lunch. The room suddenly felt too small, too confining. Ethan walked over and sat on the edge of the desk next to me, his hand resting lightly on my shoulder.

"How was your morning?" he asked, his voice soft but his gaze intense.

"Fine," I replied, trying to sound nonchalant, but my heart was racing. "Just normal classes."

Ethan's fingers trailed down my arm before he leaned closer, his breath warm against my skin. "I was thinking... maybe we should spend more time together. Just the two of us."

I nodded, but the tightening grip of his hand didn't go unnoticed. His suggestion sounded more like an order than an offer. "Sure," I muttered, avoiding his gaze, my mind still tangled in thoughts of Jason.

Before I could say anything else, my phone buzzed on the desk. Ethan's eyes immediately flicked to the screen, and I instinctively grabbed it, shielding it from his view. His brow furrowed, the tension between us thickening.

"Who's texting you?" he asked, his tone laced with suspicion.

I hesitated. "Just Ava," I lied, my stomach twisting as I realized how quickly the deception had slipped out.

Ethan's eyes darkened, his jaw clenching ever so slightly. He didn't push further, but I could feel the coldness emanating from him, like a silent warning that he wasn't fooled.

"I'll see you after class," he said abruptly, standing up and walking toward the door, leaving me with an uneasy knot in my chest.

As the door swung shut behind him, I exhaled sharply, sinking back into my chair. My phone buzzed again, and this time I didn't hesitate to check it.

It wasn't from Ava.

It was from Jason.

"Can we talk later? I feel like we need to clear the air."

I stared at the message, my mind racing. The last thing I wanted was to make things even messier, but I also couldn't ignore the unresolved tension between us. As much as I tried to deny it, there was a part of me that wanted to see Jason again, to figure out what had really changed between us.

But what would that mean for me and Ethan?

The bell rang, snapping me out of my internal debate. I gathered my things, my stomach churning with the weight of all the lies and secrets piling up.

Later that afternoon, I met Ava in the school courtyard, the autumn breeze rustling the leaves around us. She plopped down beside me, her expression as lively as ever, but I could tell she was waiting for the next bit of gossip.

"So, how's the Jason and Ethan Drama Hour going?" she teased, nudging me with her elbow.

I sighed, pulling my knees to my chest. "It's... a disaster."

Ava's smirk softened, and for once, she looked genuinely concerned. "Look, Les, you can't keep juggling both guys forever. Sooner or later, you're gonna have to choose. And no matter who it is, someone's going to get hurt."

"I know," I muttered, running a hand through my hair. "But it's not that simple. I've been with Ethan for so long, and Jason... well, he's been my friend forever. I don't even know how I feel anymore."

Ava shrugged, crossing her arms. "Feelings are messy, yeah, but at least be honest with yourself. What do you want, Lesley? Forget about Ethan and Jason for a second. What do you want?"

Her question hung in the air, a question I'd been avoiding for weeks. I opened my mouth to respond, but no words came out. Because the truth was, I didn't know anymore.

That evening, I sat in my room, staring at the message from Jason on my phone. After what felt like an eternity, I finally typed out a response:

"Okay. Let's talk tomorrow."

As I hit send, a wave of unease washed over me. Tomorrow might bring answers, but it could also unravel everything I had tried so hard to keep together. The tangled strings of loyalty and affection between Ethan, Jason, and me were tightening, and I wasn't sure how much longer they could hold.