Shattered

Chapter 12 Bradley

"Find the place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain." Joseph Campbell

Cassie, the family's soft coated wheaten terrier's head rested on her front paws, her milk chocolate brown eyes fixed on Bradley. The eight-year-old medium sized dog was fiercely loyal to her human best friend. Bradley turned off the bathroom light and inched her way into the Jacuzzi tub, the water mildly scalding her skin as she sank farther into the darkness, not a single light on in the bathroom. Bradley pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapped her arms tightly around herself and began sobbing, again.

It was humiliating. All of it. The last hour, the last twenty-four hours, the last week, every single being of her existence was humiliated and she wanted to disappear, forever. To the right of the bathroom door, at the end of her rectangular bedroom another door stood, separating Bradley from the monster, two years younger, with the same trait Whitfield family light blue eyes. Kristin slept directly across the hallway, a heart made of stone and ice in her veins. The pain was unyielding, merciless torture. And, it was hers to bear alone. The truth would crumble her parents. The family would become a poison to the community. No, Bradley couldn't tell the truth. A drop of water fell from the faucet and splashed in motionless water. She glanced at the razor through the clear glass surrounding the shower across from the bathtub. What would it take to end her life? One deep cut, or two? Maybe it would be best if Kristin did kill her. Then her suffering would be over.

Bradley heard the faint tapping on her bedroom door. Whoever it was would have to go away, because she didn't have the fortitude to see anyone, especially, if it was Mark. He had also humiliated her, after she begged her parents to let him stay close. Mark disappeared without even so much as a goodbye. He didn't care, nobody did.

The bedroom door handle turned and Cassie was on her feet, through the open bathroom door to stop whoever it was from coming in. To Bradley's dismay, Cassie didn't bark.

"Bradley," Conner called. "I'm coming in."

"NO! I'm in the bath!"

"I won't come into the bathroom," he answered. "I just...I just wanted to check on you."

"I'm fine!" she wiped her eyes. "I just want to be alone."

Cassie trotted in the bathroom and resumed her position on the rug, this time facing the door.

"Look," Conner started, "I'm not trying to bother you, but I don't think you should be alone right now."

Bradley dug her nails into her calves in frustration. She just wanted to cry it out alone. "I don't need a babysitter," she argued. "Go check on Kristin, I'm sure your twin needs you more than I do."

"Stop being a martyr." Bradley frowned. Conner never spoke to her that way. "I'm sorry," he squeaked. "I'm your brother just as much as Kristin's. And, I realize that I really have no clue going on in your life. And, I probably don't give you the benefit of the doubt a lot of the time because I know you're independent and can handle yourself, but I should be more involved in your life, and be more of a brother to you. And, dammit, I don't even know these guys you're hanging out with. I didn't even know you had a boyfriend."

Bradley inhaled deeply and buried her head between her knees. She didn't know if Mark was still her boyfriend. Maybe he never was? The term was used loosely, started by the nurse in the emergency room. But, then he had asked her to be his first relationship. A few days ago, Bradley didn't even know Mark Harber existed. He appeared in her tree house in the middle of the night, and Bradley immediately fell in love with him because of the way he protected her and looked at her adoringly. She felt the heat radiating off his body, the love he felt for her, and the admiration she saw when he looked at her through his deep blue eyes. No, she shook her head trying to forget him. It was all an illusion, a delirious fantasy, a way to win her loyalty. Mark Harber didn't love her. She wanted to believe it was real, but it couldn't be. It never existed.

There was another knock on the bedroom door and Cassie darted out of the bathroom. "Conner, please just leave and tell whoever it is that I just want to be alone. I'm just going to finish my bath and go to bed." The bedroom door opened, but Bradley couldn't hear any voices. Cassie barked and her body stiffened. "Conner?" she quickly called out secretly hoping it was Mark.

"Ah, uh, can I talk to your sister?"

Bradley recognized Brody's deep raspy voice. Brody never had good timing, especially when he was covering for Mark. Tears started falling down her cheeks again.

"She's taking a bath." There was a moment of silence. "I'm Conner."

"Brody. Brody Britton."

"Your house was where this all went down?" her younger brother asked.

Cassie started barking and backed up to the bathroom door. Someone was coming towards the bathroom. Conner appeared in the doorway with his hands covering his eyes. "Just get out and talk to him," he shrugged his shoulders and pulled the bathroom door closed.

Bradley sat motionless. Her brother was siding with Brody, yet she felt empty and emotionless. She stood up and wrapped her towel tightly around her timid body. Other than the white cotton towel, there were no clothes in the bathroom. She gripped the collar of the towel at her neck, took a deep breath and slowly stepped into the bedroom.

Conner was sitting on the edge of the canopy bed, while Brody leaned against the wall next to the dresser. Brody's dark eyes lit up when he saw Bradley. He quickly stepped forward and embraced her with excitement. Her bruised and swollen face from the beating her sister had given her nights earlier was pressed against his chest.

"I thought," he struggled finding his words, "I was so scared. I thought we lost you."

Bradley lightly brushed his back with her hands. "I'm fine," she lied as her body began to tremble. Physically, she was going to live. Emotionally, she was broken.

Brody loosed his grip and took a step back, as Conner stared at the two intensely. "Look, Mark..."

A lump quickly formed in her throat and Bradley threw her hand up begging him to stop talking. "No...you don't..."

"Hey," interjected Conner. "Not now. She's had enough for the day, and I think you should put some clothes on..." he demanded pointing at her.

"But..." Brody was really trying. Bradley nodded to Conner. She could handle one last blow before erupting on the inside. "His grandma is at his house. And, she's this insane control freak who feels the need to protect him all the time. She wouldn't even let me talk to him."

"Why not?" Bradley could feel Conner's blood pressure increasing in her defense and she increased the grip around her towel.

Brody shook his head. "The quick version, Mark's family, is all sorts of complicated. His older sister got all messed up and was murdered a few years ago. His mom lost her shit and became an alcoholic. His dad pretty much disappeared using work as an excuse. The point is, Mark hasn't been sleeping well. I mean, you know," he looked pleadingly at Bradley. She nodded acknowledging all those nights he spent in the tree house watching over her. "And, the stress about the fake kidnappings. His mom is being held in the hospital, maybe for alcoholism or being suicidal, who knows, and then last night...Bradley, I know he's not here right now...but last night...almost losing you..."

"Stop," she snapped, unable to listen to Brody's excuses. Bradley swallowed hard, confused and overwhelmed about Mark's family history. "I'm going to tell you that it's okay he's not here," she cleared her throat. "And, I honestly mean that." Brody nodded. "So, please tell Mark that I said that. And, I also said that he's off the hook. There's no need for him ever to be around here, ever again."