words: 1,825
genre: cheating (again), angst, angst, angst!
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Harry hated Simon.
"Don't leave." Harry dared to look up to meet Simon's eyes, as he knew that the tears that been threatening to fall would come pouring out.
"Why, Harry? What reason is there for me to stay?" Simon's voice didn't once hitch. He kept the same flat tone, as he struggled to keep a straight face.
"What you and I have, it-" He had an answer. He had many answers, all of them sounding so convincing to himself. He could list so many reasons Simon had to stay, so many reasons Harry thought were proof enough that their relationship was worth fighting for. Worth breaking a few rules for, even.
He had all of these reasons, yet none of them were falling off the tongue easy. The sound of disgust, and pure hatred laced in Simon's words were enough to shut Harry up.
"It what? I'm listening, Harry, go on. Tell me why I should stay." Simon cocked an eyebrow upwards, while otherwise remaining the calm look on his face.
Harry took a sharp inhale, followed by an unsteady exhale. The familiarity of the situation unsettled him. Unfortunately, moments like these had become far more knowing to him over the past few weeks. Each time, the tension building more, and more - it all seemed like it was leading to this. Never had Simon lashed out quite this hard, Harry didn't like the certainty that was far too obvious in the conversation.
"It makes me complete."
Harry heard Simon's breath shake, then followed the sound of heavy footsteps. Simon stopped when he was stood directly in front of Harry, and grabbed Harry's chin with his right hand, forcing his face up so that he had no choice but to look into Simon's eyes. "And what? You don't think it makes her feel complete too?"
Harry hated when 'She' was brought up.
Hated himself for ever allowing there to be a 'She' in his relationship.
He felt the ping of guilt and panic attack his chest, as the tears finally began to flow from his eyes.
"It won't be a secret forever, we both know that." The truth was painful, both for him and Simon.
Simon's expression finally changed, his eyebrows furrowing, his lips frowning, and a dark tint taking over his eyes. His grip tightened slightly around Harry's chin, and his hand began to shake lightly. "If this comes out, I lose everything." He was being manipulative. Harry hadn't been a stranger to that over the past couple of weeks. "Everything that I've worked for, all for nothing."
Harry dared not to say anything, instead just bringing a hand up to his cheek, wiping the tears that were slowly flowing.
"Is this all you care about? Getting revenge. Hating me." Simon was so stern, anger still laced within his words. Still, he hadn't yet raised his voice to Harry, a little care still evident.
"I wish that was all I cared about." It came out as barely a whisper. So timid, yet so certain. "Can't you see? It's you," he took another sharp inhale, and another sharp exhale, fingers coming up to wrap around Simon's wrist. Simon's hand twitched, and he looked at their hands with a glare that was so detached. Still, however, not removing it from its place on Harry's chin. "you're the worst mistake I've ever made. Falling in love with you, it ruined everything. You've turned me into the worst version of myself." He bit his lip, and fluttered his eyes shut, attempting to stop any more tears from falling.
"All of this is because of you."
Harry wanted to hate Simon.
"No," Simon wasn't one to take blame. Not even when it was rightful. Harry had come all too aware of this. "you don't get to do that."
